New Programming Language Idea: Stay

Go has become a very popular language.

There are of course many alternatives to it, but not one that's completely opposite to it in philosophy. I feel that we may need one. I mean, not really need. But want? Maybe?

Anyway, here are my suggested selling points for the fictitious language Stay:

No imports. We stay in the same file.

No file opens, for the same reason. Reading from stdin at startup is okay.

No concurrency. We stay in one thread.

No loops. We don't go round and round and round; we stay where we are.

No changing of working directory, network calls, or execs. We stay where we are.

No functions. We stay where we are.

No spec changes after first release. It stays the way it is.

We do need ifs because otherwise it's not Turing complete, but that's a compromise we grudgingly make.

There. Don't you feel like this would be the best language ever for every possible important application?

-- CC0 ew0k, 2023-03-02