A Little Anecdote about Privilege

I've always been rubbed the wrong way by phrases like "white privilege" and so forth. I mean, privilege is usually something that a person can easily relinquish, not a thing that is entirely outside of the control of an individual. I don't talk about "sighted privilege" for instance. I suppose sighted people can easily relinquish their "sighted privilege" by gouging out their eyes, but I don't recommend it. Terms like "x privilege" or "y privilege" sound accusatory, with the accusation falling on an individual, and not a society. Despite arguments over language, the whole thing, be it white privilege, male privilege, sighted privilege, whatever, this shit really does exist.

Here's a perfect example, and I think it leads directly to the crux of the issue. My girlfriend and I are both blind. Today, we were walking out of a vehicle, trying to locate a building. "Where's the sidewalk?", she wondered allowed. "Uh, baby, I'm pretty sure it's this-a-way", I replied, while pointing in the direction of the sidewalk leading to the building. Right away, I realized what I had done. I had assumed a sighted default, even though I knew damned good and well that my partner wasn't sighted. She does have a teenzy bit of vision where I have absolutely none, but yeah, she's effectively blind, and well do I know it. Thankfully I don't think she noticed.

When people talk about privilege in the context of inter-group relations, it isn't about individuals. It's about all of the shitty "default modes" in society that favor one group over another: white over non-white, male over female, heterosexual over people with other orientations, and on and on and on. We need a better word to describe this very real phenomenon, a word that brings us all together, instead of dividing us and making individuals feel accused when society is at fault.