Crash by Neal Stephenson

It can be fun to go back and revisit old cyberpunk novels. They were basically predictions of what the authors thought the era we’re living in now might be. Most of it was speculative fiction, but when Neal Stephenson came along in the early 90s with Snow Crash, one of his main goals was actually parody. The book was intended to poke quite a lot of fun at the sub-genre, as it was kind of getting driven into the ground after a decade or so of popularity. That isn’t to say he didn’t come up with any potential future technologies that our world in the here and now is exploring (the metaverse says hi). On the whole, the book was more tongue and cheek than anything else. People who are familiar with cyberpunk will get a lot more chuckles while reading Snow Crash, but even those not so clued in on the sub-genre can still enjoy it.

The story takes place in the near future, although it could be argued that the time period is right around now, but it was a good three decades away when Stephenson was writing the book. Most countries have collapsed and corporate franchises have taken their place. It would be like some neighbourhoods being owned by Amazon, another down the road owned by McDonald’s, maybe another by Tencent, and so forth. Each franchise is considered sovereign with their own sets of laws within their borders.

Amidst all this is a freelance hacker / samurai named Hiro Protagonist. He used to make good money programming, but left the scene because it became too corporate, hence the freelance career he has now, which hasn’t been going too well. Through a chance encounter, he comes across a 15 year-old girl named YT who works as a courier, a surprisingly high adrenaline job in this book. They deliver stuff just like nowadays, except that they all get around on skateboards and carry magnetic harpoon guns to attach themselves to cars so that they can get from point A to point B at 100mph or so. Eventually Hiro and YT make an agreement to share information between each other in hopes they can find something good to sell to the CIA for big money (a common hustle in this world).

One day while in the metaverse (yes, it’s a VR representation of the internet just as we’re hearing people trying to develop now), Hiro is approached by a stranger who tries to give him a virtual drug called Snow Crash. Hiro being no dumby turns it down because it could have been a virus. Unfortunately, Hiro’s friend Da5id is a dumby and takes it. As one might expect, things didn’t go well for him. Not only was his computer crashed out of the metaverse, but Da5id’s brain also crashed and he winds up in the hospital.

This leads Hiro to try and figure out what’s going on with quite a lot of help from YT. Here readers are introduced to the villain of Snow Crash: L. Bob Rife, an ultra wealthy megalomaniac who has come across some unusual ancient Sumerian tablets. On them is a form of informational virus that can be used essentially for mind control. With them, he plans to use the Snow Crash drug to help spread the virus and raise himself an army of hackers to do his bidding. What comes out of all this is a fairly exciting story as Hiro, YT, and a host of interesting supporting characters try to put a stop to all this.

Much of the humor that comes out of this is by making so much of the story extremely over the top in how it portrays cyberpunk. There are moments where things really get cranked up to the point of being almost ridiculous. That being said, I don’t think people need to be well versed in the sub genre to enjoy this book. There’s still an enjoyable story to be had here, just don’t be surprised if things seem awfully exaggerated at times.

For me, Hiro and YT really helped to carry the story. Hiro is a weird combination of a hopeless loser and a total badass. Meanwhile, YT, while brash and standoffish, is somehow likeable. On the one hand, she doesn’t take crap from anyone, but on the other she really cares about her mom. I also enjoyed the relationship that was developing between her and Uncle Enzo.

Also, the things Stephenson would choose to focus on could be pretty all over the place. At one point, he decides to completely gloss over a car chase, but at another spends pages describing the toilet paper police at YT’s mom’s office. It’s all part of the humor of the story, though it does get offset by more traditional stuff like fight scenes, data dumps about Sumerian religion, and so forth.

There were a couple of things that rubbed me the wrong way in Snow Crash, though. First and foremost was a sex scene between YT and Raven (one of the villain’s henchmen). A) It reminded me of how damn near every action movie of the late 80s / early 90s had one of these regardless of whether it made sense to be there or not (99.9% of the time it made no sense to be there), and I was left thinking “Why?” B) The really big problem I have with this scene is that YT is fifteen and this scene was pretty explicit. On the whole, it was really creepy. It left me thinking “What’s wrong with you, Neal?!?!?” as I skimmed past it as fast as I possibly could.

The other problem I had with Snow Crash is that it just sort of ended. The heroes won, the villains lost, and this was an ending I could see from a mile away, but there wasn’t quite enough closure. What happened to Hiro and Juanita after there big saving the day moment on the Raft? Did YT get home okay? Were she and Uncle Enzo able to have another nice chat? I would have appreciated another chapter or two that could tie all these things up.

Gripes aside, though, I did enjoy this book. It’s a fun look at cyberpunk from a slightly more cynical / tongur-in-cheek lens. Whether one has read other material in the sub genre or not, there’s plenty to enjoy in it.

Pennywhether

pennywhether@posteo.net

August 23, 2022