7, 2022

Waking up is hard but I'm getting better at waking myself up.

I'm finding a lot of joy in short films.

If I am having an issue its that I both want to eat and don't want to eat at the same time. I wish smoothies filled me up. I'm very much in a 'I would like to drink a smoothie or eat a granola and move on with my life' kind of mood.

-JR

6, 2022

Morning before work. I don't feel great but I should survive. I just took some meds and my hot tea is cooling hopefully it will help.

I actually feel upbeat.

After work, mostly a slog due to feeling awful from the weather but I got better.

-JR

5, 2022

I've been sick recently and I don't like it. Partner is out to get me meds. I am drinking hot tea. My ears won't pop. I have work tomorrow. Good luck to me.

I've fallen into a rut. Maybe depression. I really struggle to have fun and do basic things. I think it all started when I stopped being able to read and listen to audiobooks. Then it snowballed into things like videogames, zines, etc. Funny thing is I was feeling super accomplished around May, but its kind of been downhill.

The year is almost over this year. I wonder if I am burnt out from doing stuff. I did CBT, working out, trying to feel healthier. I'm not doing any of these things any more. I wanted to accomplish a lot of things this year and I technically did, but I wonder if I did too much. I think I expected myself or my life to change more but it didn't.

Sorry to be so whiny.

-JR