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too much work stuff, i have to go work the wildflower sale at our nature reserve tomorrow ugh. and i have a lame meeting today. stop it work
i started the deaths end audiobook last night even though i said i was going to wait
the ways that people treat art, the ways they experience it, comment on it, discuss it, are so interesting. i want to think more about this
just finished the dark forest. again, the writing is kind of terrible and the characters are wooden as hell but the ideas in the book are so well done. not often do i read books just for the concepts but i really do think they are worth it. the one pro to the way it's written, i think, is that it works as a very methodical slow burn narrative that gets more and more horrific, to the point where towards the end you're just like "oh god" every twenty minutes.
going to read the third one but i might try and wait a bit so i don't get burnt out. this book was like twice as long as the first one
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^^glad the people of reddit are with me
the dark forest lagging in the second half. go back to the imaginary girlfriend
the john cage anti-protest professor guy makes me go red evil mode. glad big joel made a video on him so i can seethe
felt guilty calling in sick to work today because of tired but it actually was good cuz im so back
real fucked up what happened at wash u
i cannot believe this book about a guy talking to his imaginary girlfriend is the sequel to the three body problem. im still invested though
tabling for the garden at bayer today X_X
is portal finally old enough that it's a cool obsession. can i dress as chell for halloween
the dark forest is an insane book
caught up with one piece. i think one piece is probably the most well-written comic, has many flaws but the characters are extremely well-realized.
the three body problem was about science and an alien-loving death cult. the dark forest, its sequel, appears to be about a man talking to his imaginary girlfriend and hanging out with her. i support this
but also, one of the dark forest's themes so far is that great literature is created when you are basically able to "hallucinate" a character into real existence. and that made me think of one piece, because you know eiichiro oda can "see" luffy. im entranced by the fact that oda started writing one piece basically as his first "work" when he was 22 and has continued to write it for over 25 years... i would get tired of the same characters running around in my head for that long
in order to go full nerd and get my nerd points, here are my top ten characters from one piece
1. big mom
2. monkey d luffy
3. tony tony chopper
4. mr 2 bon clay
5. charlotte katakuri
6. jinbe
7. that gun that can turn into a dog from alabasta
8. gang bege
9. nami
10. mont d'or
gonna keep talking about one piece. i think one piece is at its core an argument for optimism. it posits we should believe in miracles, but also not wait around for them. that is a good message. personally, i believe in that
gonna try to read the stand. why not
the fact that the neon translucent plastic trend of the 90s only lasted like 15 years makes me feel like there's a whole world of tiny aesthetic niches thru history that will be forever lost to time
crying because i had to pay the government 4 dollars in taxes
i got some cute shorts from goodwill yesterday watch out
i like when i find the sock of someone im dating in my laundry. always heartwarming <3
i just came up with something really funny
alexander mcqueen on the wiki front page again. i found out thru depths of wikipedia that this is because there is a prominent wikipedia editor with an alexander mcqueen obsession. which is awesome to know, though i do miss when it felt like my personal conspiracy
im gonna do it. im gonna cancel my freakin internet
wondering if i can actually get away without paying for internet. i can use my phone as a hotspot and i can download stuff at work. i really think it might be possible
been out of it the last 2 days. i think part of it is my house is a mess. gonna clean tonight
im so tea pilled now guys it's not even funny
saw the eclipse with my friends it was crazy like that is a freaking omen dawg
big mom is the best one piece character
theres always too much food at work, and i eat to much of it. but when there's no food at work, like today... i get sad............
actually did stuff at work today *shocked*
date of birth feels like a fake band to me like theyve been inserted into history like tlon. and they rock
just finished the three body problem. i really liked it, although the actual writing style is rather stilted. i think the ideas in it and the commentary/allegory on how humanity acts toward itself is really well done. and the science fiction concepts are terrifying. maybe the best existential horror i've ever read
driving back from eureka with X… we saw a lizard, she drank from a tub labeled “holy water”, and we might have ticks. all in all a successful outing
been reading one piece so much, makes me feel like we can defeat all our problems by punching people
X has a message for flounder: “make sure you put enough honey on your peanut butter honey sandwich or else you’ll get a mouthful of all peanut butter, no honey.”
dear diary . after 3 tries, i learnt a powerful Gamer Lesson. do not order a crt monitor from ebay. it will get broked during shipping. i am now on a painful quest to find this certain type of crt monitor i can pick up locally… painful
feelin' good
had a dream last night that someone walked by my car and was like "pff, really? a 2007 honda accord?" and i spent a long time explaining to them why it was actually a cool and reliable car (including dream facts like how my car used "G2 oil" just like ferraris). i think i convinced him. then he started crying because his daughter was missing
in real life, this was a weekend of seeing people after self-quarantining for a week. i think, thankfully, that i managed to avoid getting covid knock on wood. i had a lovely time,,, went on a hike, went to a friend's birthday party, which was really fun
and yesterday i went to X's friend's house and met more of her friends, they all seem like kind people. we played a lot of charades. and one of X's friend's little siblings is into Jojo and it was fun to talk about that. i think she is the first person I've talked to IRL who has made it all the way to Steel Ball Run. she also had the jojo ps4 fighting game and we played a round. rare extreme nerdout on my part (as opposed to my incredibly frequent mild nerdouts)
obsessed with the only three songs you can find on youtube from Date Of Birth's fake greatest hits album... i literally can't find the rest of the album anywhere online i had to order it from discogs. what da heck???
been doing a lot of thinking. i think that soon, but eventually, but soon, i'm going to have to quit my job. for my soul.
i cant wait to go to six flags
everyone should read one piece
im in self-quarantine due to covid exposure and im so bored haha.... finished uncharted 2 now im on 3
blah blah blue blue blue blue blah ble blah BLUE bla, BLABLABLABLABLABLA blue blue blue beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeh beh
beh.
beh.
^^current state of mind
i think X is a real amazing person
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need to watch myself with content consumption. i need to make time for the creation process too. i had some fun little poem thoughts on my walk just now. tricky when you have to force yourself to engage more in writing sometimes. but i want to write because i like it.
right now, i'm in a weird spot where i did two zines last year that i really liked making. but now i'm wanting to do something slightly different and i don't know what that is.
and in a way, i'm already overthinking it... i need to just let it happen. or, like: let the megastructure of the thing happen, and focus on the creation of the microstructures.
like: when i write, i have to go down deeper and deeper, magification after magnification...
a crazy role we have in the universe. we just have to sit around and desire... and that's my desire, i want to write......
to me (and i feel like most people agree), the golden age of one piece goes from Arlong Park to the end of the big war for Ace. it’s sooo gooood
really happy with my life right now ^_^
what has rowen been doing? most of what rowen has been doing is consuming media content... who wouldn't?
been reading one piece, just started replaying uncharted 2 (i have a soft spot for anything that feels like indiana jones/national treasure -_-), almost caught every pokemon in gen 4, watched the iron giant recently (great movie)...
played mario party with my friends last night and it was super fun
and i am working on a paper mache mask (X is making one too) and i'm super excited about it (but worried about my painting abilities when we get to that stage...)
anyone have any good sci-fi book recs
ok yall i have an idea for a horror story i could write. think i can pull it off??
so excited for daylight savings time (or the end of it or whatev) honestly
somehow, by the magical process of actually doing my job, i have basically caught up on almost every task at work. to be honest, it's a good feeling
trying to figure out if i could write a horror story or not. i like reading them but i don't quite know how i would write one
get ready for not one but two Gamer Opinions
Gamer Opinion 1: the final fantasy 7 remake games look terrible and the voice acting and animation and everything looks so awful to me. it feels like the game version of the one piece netflix show or that man in the high castle show adaptation where everything is as deliberate and slow as possible and there is no stylistic effort at allllllll
Gamer Opinion 2: finished disco elysium and it's so awesome so good good good good, good game that's good
bad news for music fans everywhere… ive been obsessively listening to Gordon the last few days…….
my birthday’s tomorrow!
i'm taking the day off tomorrow for my birthday and i think that's the greatest decision i've ever made in my life
bloop bleep blop bleep blurp bloop bleep blop bleep bleep bloop mip mip mip mip brrrrm brm brm blop brm zip zip zip zip zip zip zrrrrrrrrrrrrr zip zrrrrrrrrrrrr shshshshshshsh sh sh sh shff shff shff shff step step step step walk walk walk walk foot foot foot step foot step foot step walk walk walk chirp chirp shff shff shff bip shff bip bleep shff blop bop bop bleep
^^how i feel right now
really i simply had the best weekend ever with X as the weather turns to Good albeit frighteningly early, but walking in the woods feels powerful delightful. more specifically, i played four square with my friends, what a healing and healthifying thing to do and we played for hours. and the next day, hung out on grand with X and played disco elysium among other things. on sunday, the final day, i met X's mom who is a certified cool mom who reads graphic novels (and has an entire bookshelf full of them) and recommended some to me. then we hiked at saint francois, and for some reason there were only like 5 people there on the nicest day in history.
now, at work, i must work. but soon i will not be at work.
i am growing more and more enamored with disco elysium
here are some media consumption goals for the coming months:
--finish This Is How You Lose Her
--finish This Is How You Lose The Time War
(learning how to lose things)
--finish Disco Elysium (this will probably happen next)
--finish The Three Body Problem (on audiobook)
--finish 2666 (long-term goal, 2024 goal, im ~100 pages in)
--finish catching all the pokemon up to gen 4 (i am probably 70% of the way there)
--read dubliners
my current movie watch list for the near future:
--RRR
--unico in the island of magic
--im thinking of ending things
--brazil
have fun out there yall
my review of watchmen: it's kind of really awkward to read, between the extra stuff and the pirate side story and the heavy amount of text, the actual fact that it's a comic kind of takes a backseat. the nine-panel-a-page setup also makes it feel a little stiff. also, it's got a bit of that "edgy for the sake of edgy" shit like sandman and a lot of older "gritty" comics. but it's still a really cool story and i think the cold war commentary holds up and does a good job feeling as dread-inducing now as it was then. the characters are really fun and so's the ending. that was my review of watchmen, the comic that every nerd on earth has reviewed
im a fake fan of old technology….. i looked at a dell crt monitor for five minutes and now i feel like im gonna throw up….. the flicker…..
i'm very interested in this year. in what will happen to me. i feel like this is the most unknown mental and physical space i've ever entered. everything is familiar, but i can sense a ghost. but not a past ghost, a ghost of something real in the future. slowly becoming real like accumulation of mist/ectoplasm
this is a year where i could probably be convinced magic tricks are real. where if somebody read my fortune on their own devised set of predictive cards, i would expect it to come true. like always, i keep thinking about shoemaker-levy 9. i think it will probably happen again in our lifetimes, and we'll see the spot on jupiter.
it's funny how (at least in my experience) after you've tripped enough times, all trees just look like that forever. spindly twisty with a pattern. this year i feel very connected to my skin. i feel like my sense of touch has improved. my nose and tongue are dull but the tips of my fingers are on fire.
this could be the year i die by car accident, but it will probably just be the year i paint something on a really big canvas. this year, i want to hear the ringing of metal banging against metal in a fun, musical way. i want to behave like a parrot or a dog, and maybe screech at someone. i want to lay down on the floor and hear humming. i want to walk around and smile
local stl resident’s life CHANGED forever by world’s most comfortable pair of pants
playing disco elysium and reading watchmen makes me feel like i'm going to put on a long coat and walk into 1992, like the matrix hasn't come out yet but when it does, i'll fall in love with it but find it pedestrian at the same time......
making myself read all the watchmen extra non-comic bits, which i definitely skimmed over when i was 18….. some of it is really good and some of it is four pages of bird science…….???
treating all my meetings today like i'm all 12 of the angry men
im doing my work’s cyber training and the training is set up like you’re watching a livestream of a hacker doing a Q&A, with a fake twitch chat and everything
also he swears in this???? amazing
just watched 12 angry men. kind of wild how it's a movie about social injustice starring 12 angry white dudes and no one else. it was also really good. also it just is a great name for a movie
i think i forgot how cool it is to read and watch movies and stuff again. it's so fun
rereading watchmen
proud of myself for fixing my computer
rewatched being john malkovich with X last night
got a paper journal. i think springtime is journal time
oh also, i showed X the moomin tv show and she really likes it and im so happy abt that
the vaporwave aesthetic is so surface level. always been boring to me. now the backrooms, i think i get that one
at the core of my being is a supreme confidence that my dumbass jokes are extremely funny
im so bored at work im going to start eating all the things in my office. starting with my chair!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
sometimes i want to shitpost in my old english professors' facebook post comments so bad and i have to stop myself
i think the key to solving my entire musical taste is that i think stereotype a is cibo matto’s best album
24 hours of reflection on the family guy dream. i think this is a good thing. it symbolizes a lack of worry in my life. all my subconscious wants to do is watch family guy. maslow's peak. the pointy part of the hierarchy. sugar for the soul. this is the fingertip of God
they finally broke me and i got youtube premium
a regular old day here at Work, where everything is Work, except i don't want to Work, and it's nice out.
i had a really fun time at the moment open mic last night and everyone reading their poetry was really inspiring to me. i really want to make more stuff
im going on a valentines date with X tomorrow and im really happy abt that
all that said, last night i had a family guy dream... so my mind will probably finish its decomposition within 10-15 days
yall… i had a dream last night that was me trying to find a funny clip from family guy.
they were trying to delete peter’s voice completely from the internet, because the voice actor changed or the show ended or something.
but yeah… what is the world coming to… im having family guy funny moments dreams….
alexander mcqueen on the wikipedia front page again. i swear that guy has the most front page representation of any human being. someday i’ll run the numbers
i think my new goal is to try recording some stuff with the microphone i picked up a while back (on uncle-altoid's suggestion)... is it too insane to want to record a spoken word album
just got a 400 combo on ddr nonstop mode
my mood is so blatantly tied to the weather its so funny it makes me feel like the rest of my brain is fake, phantom imagery justification
X is so cool it’s crazy
best roger ebert quote
alex you should approve my friend maxine's account that she made......????
la la la la la la la its nice out la la la la
must work out tomorrow! kinda forgot today
i read my book and listened to an audiobook like real springtime rowen… cant wait to be them
snufkin on wikipedia front page?good omen
just had the worst nightmare ive had in a long time :(
wow the first pokemon games came out in japan 2 days before i was born
in my letter mailing era
getting over a 2 day strangeness that i think might have been the most mild sickness. feeling productive and sleepy at the same time. i think i need a pilgrimage. unfortunately i've used much of my work vacation time on being depressed
ok i have 4 days of vacation currently. gotta hold on to those
unsustainable addictions:
spending money
sustainable addictions:
pokemon
warming
it's my month people get ready for the big event
but first the groundhog
read some more of 2666 last night im going to get reading again i swear
high of 67 today!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
springtime day. we're gonna get tricked by this groundhog i just know it
feeling on the verge of something. like something's coming. i think it's that damn groundhog. i think he's gonna do something big this year
somehow i tricked myself into actually working today at work
manic obsession levels High as rowen tries to get his printer working on the imac
just found a pristine half full pack of smokes on the ground
this feels flounder coded
spending too much money. have to stop now
have to work out before i go to bed. i will do these things!
i can flounder from my papasan chair now
sleepy sleepy crazy, i want it to be spring so i can read outside. grateful for my friends and beck. and my unrelenting courage(?)
loving the "official explanation" jim davis gave for why garfield hates mondays
booted up my imac to write this post because i'm just that cool
spent most of the day with X. we went to an antique mall (i bought jeans and a set of coasters), then we saw the st louis symphony perform peter and the wolf among other things thanks to free tickets i got cuz im friends with a lovely person who works there. then we went to my house and danced around and watched the green knight :)
posting from mac os 9
it's definitely less cute than os X but it runs better on this computer
enjoyed the open mic last nite and the nite before playing mancala with X. yayy
the old mac is so cool. this is exactly the kind of shit i eat up like candy. and i can play adventure games on it !!!
i think my next project is to get the imac connected to my printer. which apparently is possible
excited to play mancala with X tonite
the weather is punching me in the gut like today i had to do the thing where i text my boss i'm coming in an hour late cuz i could barely move
but now i feel really good so turns out listening to your body is really good for you
i did not succeed in putting os 9 on my imac because my CD burner is dead so i have to get another one ack. wait thinking about it i think my old computer has a cd burner on it
and i think i found it... the papasan chair that's going to cure me
but that's the last money i'll ever spend i swear
why the f doesn't anyone make a giant papasan chair
im going to try to dual boot mac os 9 onto the imac. my tech know-how stops at the “my grandson’s a computer whiz” level so wish me luck
dream report: me and a bunch of other people navigating a rotting abandoned house, half the floor would collapse if you walked on it. was bringing a bike with me. found a bunch of towels themed after mario kart courses, took one. we all sat in a room and introduced our dnd characters. it was getting dark, so we carefully traversed back out the house. i forgot my towel so i went and got it
flounder is cool because you can subsume the angst and ennui of people you dont know and also learn how to grow a plant from a single cell
i have the morning off 2day cuz of weather yayyyyyyyyyyyyy
whole day off
my pokemon search is going well (trying to catch them all in gen 4). i have all the legendaries including manaphy that i had to play pokemon ranger for. just got feebas. i need one more fossil, then the rest are pretty much “find em in the grass”. but there are a ton of those that i dont have. and i also have to level them up to evolve
i feel like i have come to a good agreement with winter. i wont ruffle its hair, and it wont mine. i exist in my home, and sometimes i hang out with my friends or X. i go to work with both a sigh and grit. i listen to new wave and look at my dog. yesterday i played ddr and did the best ive ever done. and at the end of the day, i take a deep breath and send a piece of myself forward into spring
this is earth and it’s nice, because we came here to have a good time through a lot of empty space
past couple days ive been so into cleaning it’s awesome???
so tired today
posting on flounder from my iMac g3 blueberry
stl folks, just know that next wednesday it's gonna be high of 48. cling to that as i am
organizing things in my house
my train got canceled cuz its too cold but i got another train for tomorrow
we went to a store that had so many zines it was cool
just watched the fly
im really happy the radio/tv station wikipedia people are getting their day in the limelight
painting
successfully read on the train
bugleague and i watched C.H.U.D.
on da train to chicago to see bugleague
watched the neverending story last night. pretty sure that was the first time i watched it from start to finish
here is what i have to do today
-work
-go home and work out
-nap maybe if i can swing it
-vacuum?
-back to work lol
winter end NOW
addicted to haircut 100. played some for R and they were unimpressed :P
i've been watching so many movies lately it's crazy
my hot take is every disappointing franchise film sequel is the best movie
i don't like texting it's so hard
winter is so hard i should be living on the equator
wait i might like texting now. X and i are having a text rap battle. they called it a "rap cold war". i think that is really funny
it's getting to the point where i really need to do things for my job and i just... can't... bring myself to do them........
i'm spending money recklessly on the internet again........
good rowen: i'm trying to stop eating out so much. i'm getting off doordash. i'm going to aldi because it's cheaper
bad rowen: i just spent $400 on an iMac g3 blueberry 1999 fruit pc with matching colored keyboard and mouse
it snobed
everett true is so cool
watched legally blonde
good, movie
i made a gitlab account to test the mario fan game i worked on when i was 17 and now gitlab's adding me on linkedin and calling me at work ;-; vendors amirite
X and i watched man on wire. hardcore recommend
remember when actor mike butters said "pepsi for tv game" in the pepsi-based japanese-only videogame pepsiman
i've been thinking about that a lot lately
wow i just signed my lease for next year and they didn't increase my rent. they even told me they were going to when i signed last year. this is awesome
honestly it's so funny how happy this is making me rn
going to the goodbye house show on saturday demanding all the ambient noiseheads make their next 40 minute track centered around this:
rowen getting out of sick here is my plan
NOW
-do dishes
-shower
-go to bed normal time
TOMORROW
-go to work
-go home
-ddr
-bonus: lunch with mothbaby
-go get my tattoo from S finished
-back to work
-clean my house
-hang out with X
-bedtime
THURSDAY
-work harder than i did on wednesday
-help O with her zine
-hang out with E <-------------------------------------im here right now
these are my plans
i would also like to state that for the first time in my long life, today i intentionally bred an egg move onto a pokemon. it was mean look onto absol from smeargle capturing it off a golbat. i am now a true gamer
apparently the mario fan game i worked on when i was 17 is finally coming out. that is crazy
working my last fjucking garden glow (garbage glow) and i can't wait to go out of here and leave
i'm hanging out with X tomorrow yay
been a bit off lately, i think because beck and i haven't been walking cuz of his injury, plus i've been sick so i can't do ddr. all i can do is sit! i've even watched movies
bored at work but i don't really have anything interesting to write on flounder
i've been playing pokemon............
one of my friends and one of my other friends just broke up with each other... that's all i know. i think i'm going to get the tea on thursday
i am a sucker for gossip, which is usually fun and occasionally not great. but usually fun
haven't really been thinking about much lately... ice over my brain
i feel bad for beck, i can tell he's bored. i've been trying to give him things to do. he's kind of a funny dog in that he's not really a self-starter. he rarely tries to get me to play with him, but if i start playing with him he gets excited about it
i was sick on new years. the last thing i did in 2023 was watch indiana jones and the kingdom of the crystal skull
i went to the history museum the other day and they have a cool thing where you can color on the walls and color in stl buildings. it kinda rocked, recommend
theres a lot out there in the world to see but i think i could live another six or seven years in stl and not regret it. doesnt mean i will tho
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