I feel like I have to get something out of the way. Why am I working on a Windows feature for Emacs in the first place?

I mean, obviously I use Windows as an OS and therefore I use Emacs on Windows. I could run Emacs on WSL and I've done that in the past, mainly because it makes working with open source software easier. But eventually I drift back to working on Windows. I think if I used a computer all day every day I would just punt and install Linux and be done with it. But the fact for me is Windows is just easy to use, works easily with whatever random hardware I throw at it, and is good enough with the other stuff that I do every so often that I can deal with it.

That answer isn't really satisfying though. As mentioned in the very Emacs FAQ for Windows,

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1.1 Why support GNU Emacs on Windows?

It is not our goal to “help Windows users” by making text editing on Windows more convenient. We aim to replace proprietary software, not to enhance it. So why support GNU Emacs on Windows?

We hope that the experience of using GNU Emacs on Windows will give programmers a taste of freedom, and that this will later inspire them to move to a free operating system such as GNU/Linux. That is the main valid reason to support free applications on nonfree operating systems.

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I guess I haven't fully resolved these questions internally yet. I feel like in principle I support free software. On the other hand I don't feel like MS, as an organizing force that makes money selling software, is totally bad either, despite some of their dumb stuff I experience by using their software. I think living so close to them has something to do with that. They feel like part of the community. On the other hand they're a mega corporation doing all the stupid shit mega corps do. Maybe I'm just naive, uneducated or both. Maybe this journey into Emacsland will help me see.