From: QEChat Log anine <-> sam To: anine (Amelia Nine) To: sam (Sameen Lee) Delivered-To: Sameen Lee Received: from relay3.qec7.rs001.l4.earthsys.gov by mta1.recoveryinstitute.org with ESMTPS id CACAEDA29A5ECB for Received: from relay2.qec5.ganymede.earthsys.gov by relay3.qec7.rs001.l4.earthsys.gov Received: from host3.qechat.earthsys.gov by relay2.qec5.ganymede.earthsys.gov Date-Local: 08 Sep 2421 19:22:07 +0000 Date: 08 Sep 2421 19:22:07 +0000 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="utf8" Subject: Chat Log anine <-> sam [18:39] anine: hey sam: hey! sam: how's it going out there? haven't heard from you anine: been super busy! finally settled down a little anine: we heard back from gliese, not as bad as we thought anine: all still concerned over ross but watch & wait seems to be the plan anine: anyway, not what we're here for, i'm glad you heard from kit! [18:02] sam: me too! anine: and i'm glad you answered her. if you want to know what i think, you waited longer than you should've to do that. sam: you're right. sam: i hope you don't mind i sent your love too anine: no! Not at all anine: i would've asked you to already but i wasn't sure if [18:03] anine: i mean it's been so long, i wasn't sure sam: come on, you know kit, she can't have changed THAT much anine: yeah but i always thought, you know anine: eh, forget it [18:04] sam: what anine: no it's nothing sam: no it's not. sam: talk to me [18:07] anine: do you know, we talked about marrying? anine: kit and me anine: it would've solved the biggest problems for both of us anine: wouldve been perfect [18:09] sam: your idea or hers? [18:10] anine: hers anine: you know i'd never have suggested it sam: me either anine: and she really tried anine: she tried sO HARD [18:11] anine: but she coudlnt anine: couldnt stand it, i made her stop anine: i could see it was killing her but she wouldnt stop until she had a panic attack anine: even aftert hat she wanted to try again [18:12] anine: i wouldnt let her anine: we both felt terrible about it anine: but then i went and got married anyway anine: because anine: it was easier that way, i could deal better than she could and it did solve a lot of problems for me [18:13] sam: the same ones she had anine: yes anine: and wouldnt so lve [18:14] anine: I mean if she'd just go to therapy anine: it's not like we'd have loved her any less sam: no sam: but she wouldnt have wanted to be with us after that sam: and you know wjy she wouldnt do it anyway [18:15] anine: yes anine: she wouldn't compromise the way i ddi anine: did* anine: she held on to herself in a way i couldnt anine: and god knows i HATED her for that [18:16] anine: for a long time anine: i mean she had it so much worse than me and she just anine: WOULDNT anine: i mean anine: she made me feel like [18:17] sam: you felt like a coward [18:18] anine: yeah anine: that she could deal and i couldnt [18:19] anine: and then she joined voortrekker and that was even worse anine: here she was, ready to go to another STAR STYSTEM anine: because maybe there it'd be better anine: and i mean [18:20] anine: we had such a hard time selling the no kids requirement anine: i think that was as much as anything what decided her anine: and, i don't know [18:21] anine: i just never felt like i could face her after all that [18:22] sam: so that's why you didn't come see us before she left anine: between that and the fight anine: yeah [18:24] sam: look, i'm not supposed to tell you this, okay sam: but you need to hear it [18:25] sam: the last night kit was here before she went to join the ship sam: we stayed up all night talking sam: and that came up anine: oh shit anine: oh no [18:26] sam: NO sam: stop sam: listen sam: you know what she said? sam: she said she wished she was as brave as you [18:27] anine: what sam: YES sam: she didn't see it as you making a cowardly compromise sam: i know that's how YOU see it sam: but that's wrong sam: and kit KNEW that was wrong sam: you did what you had to do [18:28] sam: to have the best life you could with this bullshit government youre stucck with sam: kit respected that sam: and she wished you'd decided to come sam: so she could tell you she was sorry she couldn't help you [18:29] anine: on bulslhiy anine: l anine: loko i appreciate you tryign anine: to make me feel better but anine: come on we both know thats bullshit [18:30] sam: Dry your eyes and think a minute. sam: You know me better than that. [18:32] anine: Yeah. [18:33] anine: I'm sorry. sam: nothing to apologize for [18:34] sam: im sorry i didn't tell you before. sam: if i'd known you felt this way about it sam: but i shouldve told you. sam: i'm sorry. [18:35] anine: its ok anine: i need a minute anine: brb [18:49] anine: you here? sam: still here. anine: look ive got a bunch of leave saved up sam: you've got some leave right? sam: haha anine: YES haha [18:50] anine: so like i said things have settled down around here anine: why dont i come see you before next friday sam: can you get away? anine: yea theres a luna shuttle leaving night after next anine: ive been "mentioning" im going to stop on luna after i rotate out [18:51] anine: to see what i can find out unofficially about the gliese mission sam: makes sense, ill tap my contacts over at the extrasolar office sam: maybe get you something to take back, save you some time sam: at least let them know youre coming [18:52] anine: ok sam: its a good excuse anine: haha yea anine: even with joseph anine: hes mad anyway with all the work lately [18:53] sam: not going to cause more problems? anine: than i already have? maybe anine: but you'll make me feel better about them anine: wont you sam: you know i'll do my best [18:54] anine: your best is mighty good, lover sam: pas devant le CQE, ma cherie! anine: haha ok ok [18:55] sam: save it for when you're here. anine: oui, madame! [18:56] sam: i wish i didn't sam: but i do still have some work left today anine: i'll leave you to it, then. anine: you'll tell me if you hear more from kit? sam: of course sam: i can tell her you want to hear from her [18:58] anine: not yet i think sam: okay sam: let me know when you're ready [18:59] anine: thank you! sam: de rien. anine: and [19:00] anine: send her my love? sam: of course. [19:01] anine: off to go break the news anine: and be properly apologetic. sam: good luck! anine: i'll be thinking of you! [anine: Quit: it really does help..] [sam: Quit: ] gemini://cosmic.voyage/Voortrekker/11-its-not-like-wed-have-loved.txt

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