In engineering

We frequently use

What we call

Factor of Safety

This is when

You run a bunch

Of calculations

And get an answer

But

You’re not so sure

If it’s actually right

And you don’t want

To get in trouble

So you multiply

Everything by five

Or whatever number

Point is it’s made up

You do all this

Hard science

As they call it

And at the end

You just fudge it

Try and make it work

Im there right now

In the fudge zone

Just making it work

Boy oh boy

Do i love fudge

Yum yum yum

Fudge

My momma she’s a believer

In god above yeah but so am i

In my own way

But what she really believes in

Is the big red devil

Two-horned spade-tailed

Pitchfork-poking devil

Cackling in the sulfur flames

Waiting to punish her for

Every single misstep

Every single mistake

Anything wrong you do

He knows and is counting on

So he can get you when you die

She believes in demons

Which possess you

From way down deep

From some other world

An evil dark one

Equal in size greater in power

Than the world in which we live

Made by god above for his child

She isn’t loud about it

She keeps it quite private

But she believes in ghosts

In evil spirits that will get you

She feels like she must be

Good and holy

Every loving moment

In order to elude the grasp

Of the many dark dead hands

Which will pull you down to hell

She is anxious

She must be perfect

Or the devil will get her

It worries me

For i am anxious too

But i have no devil

And yet i still fear him

In the little ways

That she taught me

To keep me safe

From burning eternal

It was the last day of summer

And i didn’t know it

Once the sun set that night

It would rise again smaller

All the leaves would give up

On growing soaking up light

They would burn yellow red

Then brown then gray

I was swimming

Bobbing up and down in the wake

Of a boat i couldn’t see

It was the last day of summer

And i didn’t know it

Lying in the sun bleeding

Thinking it’d be like this

For a long while longer

But we had gone too far

In our regular orbit

So the following silent morning

It was cold and i didn’t know why

Summer was over

I just hoped

Prayed even

That it would come back

After winter and spring

That i could get back to summer

Chicken god cockadoodledoo

At the rising sun

Chicken god peck at the earth

Where seeds begin to sprout

Chicken god flew the coop

God coop where straw nest lies

In there is Egg god round and brown

Chicken god says to Egg god

I think you created me

Egg god cracks a smile

I thought you created me

This yolk inside me

It feels like you

Chicken god flaps its wings

Bobs its chicken godhead

One of us made the other

But it is not clear which

Either you are my creator

In which case i will worship you

Or i am your creator

In which case i should Shepard you

But i am not sheep or Shepard god

I am Chicken god

I do chicken things

I will worship you Egg

And you can worship me

Then

At least one of us is right

Then you can hatch into

The next chicken god

Creator of yourself

And i will lay myself

Unto the brand new egg god

Each of these younger gods

Will know to worship

The piece of themselves

That lies outside

Egg god just rolled over

No chicken legs to stand on

So they lean against each other

Til one of them changes

If i can be honest with you

And i can

Because i choose to be

I’m not confused at all

I’m not undecided at all

I know where i am going

But

Because i am stubborn as hell

Like my father and his parents

Both of them god bless

I have to do it my way

I have to invent it all from scratch

Or it doesn’t count

Or i can’t justify it

It is hard work

And i need to do it right

And i want to do it perfectly

But I’ve made my peace with that

I grant myself the grace i need

To do this impossible thing

Slowly so slowly

Forgive me my trespasses

Be patient for me for now

I am trying to fly

I feel like I’m not in control

So i move the chairs around

I try to fix something

I go to Lowe’s and i buy a tool

And i get sweaty while

Trying to loosen a bolt

I knock on the wall to find a stud

I get my tape measure out

And start dreaming of

New places to put the tv

I light a candle and breathe it in

I get on my bike

But the seat is too high

So i ride it to the shop

Make idle conversation with bike girl

While she fixes my bike

She fixed the last one too

Before it got stolen

I like her but I ran out of

Reasons to go to the bike shop

So maybe it’s good it got stolen

I eat lunch and spin the table

Straighten the books on the shelf

Like that’s going to change something

I don’t know

The energy feels new

The space flows differently

It’s nice mostly because

I feel like I’m in control

Somebody died today

Yesterday they were

Now they aren’t

I did not know them

Now i never will

Except for the way

That you know people

From how they’ve

Rubbed off on everyone else

But somebody died today

And I’m not gonna meet them

Could be that’s why

I’m feeling strange

Could be other things

Like i bought two snails

One of them is so lively

She gets up when i

Switch on the aquarium light

And starts eating til i turn it off

The other one

She hasn’t left her she’ll

In four whole days

I read online they do this sometimes

I think she may be overwhelmed

With the change

She’s working through it

On the inside

Or maybe i feel strange

Because last night i was asked

To think about the future

In a room full of people

Who have been doing

The job that i do

For decades at least

And to me the future

Is weird and full of smoke

I do not dream of shaking hands

Wearing ties and networking

I just want to do something

Useful with my time

Build something big

That helps people

Not because i got paid to

Not because it was requested

But because it’s needed

I guess i want the world to be smaller

Shrunk down to 25 percent

That way everyone is closer

And everything is simpler

Like the pixels stay the same size

But the resolution decreases

When I’m 8bit I’ll be happy

Or it’ll look like I’m smiling

Just one of those days

Where you feel weird about the future

You look forward and

Feel weird about it

I can’t stay like this forever

Half in and half out

But i can’t picture it yet

The other option

I breathe in

I breathe it out

The earth is running out of helium

We keep letting go of balloons

And they drift up and out into space

They don’t come back

What the hell are we supposed to do

At birthday parties and graduations

We could use some other noble gas

But none of them float at all

They’re too heavy

So i guess all our celebrations

If we even have anything to celebrate

Will be balloons full of hot breath

Full of saliva kicking on the ground

Maybe some ribbons and streamers

It won’t be the same as it was

Alvin and the chipmunks will be out of work

No more me i want a hula hoop

Man that sucks that fucking blows

It hasn’t happened yet

But when it does hoo boy

That’s gonna be pretty awful rotten

No good no fun no party

What are we to do

Stop the party now?

I think not

I think we have one last party

A farewell to helium

And we use all we have left

Fill a million billion balloons

And let them all go

Up to the sun

Or wherever they go

That would be pretty cool

The cells of the body

Have no clue

What the brain is thinking

They know not

Where they are going

Not a damn clue why

But they fulfill their function

Until apoptosis

It goes like that

The brain

Stupid as it is

Doesn’t even consider the cell

The human superorganism

All of us cells

It knows something we do not

It argues with god

Like an equal

Makes sweeping statements

About the nature of being

Being of nature

It claims

Life

Stupid as it is

Doesn’t even consider god

Life is sacred because it has will

Free choosing will to act

And humans freest of all

Have the most free will

What greater proof

What greater act of free will

Than suicide

Rejection of destiny

Refutation of preordination

So the human superorganism

Not consulting the little cells

Points itself towards extinction

With a grin on its many little faces

It marches forward thinking

This will prove it

This will prove us free

Ha!

I miss you man

Been too long

To ever say it

But i wonder

Every now n then

How it turned out

On your end

Wonder if you’re

Wondering back

Wandering back

Doubt it

That’s life oh well

apple

One apple John green

He sees only words in his mind

Which is why

Not having read them

I think his books must be bad

He cannot see the outline

Not even gray

Not even dull

Not even flat

He cannot see five apple

He cannot taste it

Feel its weight in his mind hand

Cannot smell the cool flesh

Spraying as you take a bite

I have five six seven apple

It can do everything a real apple can

Save for satiate my hunger

Venus in the sky in the morning

Stapled to the blue black dark

The white light of the sun

Reflected here a little yellow

You’re spinning too

Way out there i know it

You’re spinning too

I dreamt i died

In a warmly lit building

With high ceilings

Where i had just arranged

All of my things

There were sheep next door

And i knew them

I died of some disease

Randomly reasonlessly

In the middle of

Several important arcs

I was reincarnated

As a seventeen year old me

I ran and found my brother

I told him what happened

He hadn’t heard yet

That i was dead

I told him where i was

Where he could find me

Then got in a car

I drove fast

I was hurrying somewhere

There was still time i thought

To get back to where i was

I needed something first

So i stopped at the store

It was a store i had been to before

Only in other dreams

Dream store grocery hardware store

Some guy asked me

If i could help him find

The barbecue sauce

I said yes and can i tell you

Something so fucked up

Which happend to me

I died man

I Just Died

Only maybe an hour ago

Right when it was getting good

I had stuff going on man

Let’s check this aisle

I can’t remember what

I needed to get here

But i had a feeling

I wasn’t old enough

I was going to burn this life

To get back to the last one

I had unfinished business

And i needed to come back

Here’s your bbq sauce

Best of luck to you

Wake up

I’m building a world in my mind

With all the things i like

All the stories i want to tell

The places i want to visit

The meaning i want to find

Sometimes my world leaks

And i find myself dreaming

Of places I’ve never been

People I’ve never met

I wish i could pull it out

From inside my big head

And stick it in a snow globe

So i could watch it from the outside

Hands cupping the glass

As i shake it up

And watch the snow fall

On people and creatures

On land and ocean

On planets and stars

And in the inbetween

My world has voids

Places where there’s nothing

And something could fit there

There’s a place for you

An empty spot on a real comfy chair

Atop a hill i think you’d really like

It’s calm there and beautiful

But there’s so much more than that

In this world of mine I’m building

It’s just a matter of getting there

well

Got snails today

Checked the mail today

Paid my rent today

Worked on my bike today

Did my laundry today

Worked from home today

Felt quiet today

Sang a song today

Played guitar today

Ate a apple today

Took a shower today

And now I’m bored

The world was full of magic

Full of wonder and awe

And anyone could use it

As long as they believed in it

But then the wizards came in

They believed magic needed

Hierarchy, reverence, restriction

They laid out rules and regulations

Intricate rituals and rites of passage

If you want to use the magic

You must do so through the proper channels

They gathered all items of power

And locked them up in their towers

They made everyone wear matching robes

And grow big long gray beards

They took all the fun and whimsy out of it

Made it a thing of secrecy and structure

Over time people forgot

All the spells they used to do

All the wonder they used to see

The magic that pulsed in the air invisible

It was only the wizards who recalled

How to use the magic of the world

And they hoarded it and used it all up

So when the magic left the world

They were the only ones who knew to mourn

Those long bearded fools

They do not know that it’s coming back

As soon as you believe in it

You can hold in your hands

Real magic in the world

Went to a estate sale

Of a woman i had known

For twenty three of my

Twenty four years

I missed her and it was strange

Standing in her home

In this context

She was a witch and a psychic

She was a Christian

Had books on Buddhism

And astral projection

She did seances and exorcisms

She lived a long life

And i was standing in her home

At the end of it

Looking at all of her things

With price tags on them

She had owned an antique store

Her husband was an artist

She had eclectic taste

There were so many cool things

I felt her there in many ways

It was good but sad

I bought some of her books

And a classical guitar

Something with her handwriting

And i walked it all home

When somebody good dies

Even when they’re old

People say that’s sad

And it is

People say I’m sorry

When somebody bad dies

People say

Nobody deserves to die

Don’t make light of death

Don’t wish it upon people

Even evil people

But actually not

Everyone deserves to die

That’s the cost of living

That’s the toll you pay

You live until you die

And it’s good

There needs to be an end

So you can look back and say

Damn i miss them

Look at all the life they lived

Look at this old guitar

It reminds me of her

And it makes me feel loved

That’s what death does

Reminds you of life

You and Elon musk

Have this in common

You will never live in space

By the time some idiot

Figures out how to

Live on mars or Venus

There will be too much junk

Satellites and space debris

Caught in orbit around

Pale blue dot

That any launch from the surface

Means certain death

Collision with centimeter particle

Moving very very fast

Ripping through the fuselage

Turning you and the rest

Into yet more space debris

There are skulls in orbit

And they will stay there

Until long after everybody died

Maybe the dust they became

Forms a ring

And someone else

If there is anyone else

Can dream of life

Out among the stars

But it won’t be you

It won’t be us

And i think it’s a good thing

We were trapped here already

This is the only place we live

The only place we can

And the only place we should

No cloud city Venus

No climate dome Mars

Just all of us here

On the blue eye of god

Not for nothing

But for a moment

I thought it was

Not that it isn’t

Or wouldn’t be

Just it hasn’t been

Get your sleep

When you can

It’s going to be

Bright and loud tonight

And the morning

Will be cold and weird

It’s the best you can get

For the low low price

Of stealing it sneakily

Slipping in your pocket

Anything you want

As long as you can hold it

The other stuff

Too heavy too intangible

Can be stolen too

If you get creative

Everything has its price

And the price is

Free free free

Nothing belongs to no one

Everything belongs

To everyone

Five finger ten finger

Ten toe discount

Grab and run

Take what you can

You never know

You might need it

More than they do

Smile

Uh huh yeah

Wow

Yeah yeah

Yeah that makes sense

Oh really

Well

So

Uh huh

Yeah well

I don’t actually care who wins

Yeah i know what i said

Or implied really

But i don’t care who wins the game

You do

And good for you

But i don’t care who wins

At all

Not even a little

So

Maybe we could talk about

Something

Anything else

Or

And i don’t mean to be rude

We could just not talk

I wouldn’t need to

If you weren’t

Poking your head

Craning your neck

Trailing off at the end of each sentence

Waiting for me to fill the gap

Yap yap yap

See

I don’t like this job

And if i wasn’t getting paid

I wouldn’t even know you

Or want to know you

Nothing personal it’s just

All you know

Is talking about the game

And who’s gonna win

And how much you care

But

I don’t care about that

And you don’t seem to care about

Anything else

Which is weirder i think

Than my thing

I was a sinner in a past life

I was a bad bad boy

I spit in people’s food

I stomped on people’s toes

I did everything i wanted to

And everything i wanted

Was so very bad and evil

And i got away with it all

Never faced the music

Never got my comeuppance

So all that bad karma bad juju

Got passed on down to me

Sweet angel me

Born with hair on my head

And a cord around my neck

Choking me even after

The doctor severed it

It chokes me still

I got bad luck

Bad timing or something

Other people tell me this

Otherwise i woulda

Just thought that was the odds

Snake eyes every time

That’s okay

I am good at this

I’m building up some good karma

With good deeds sweet actions

So when i die

I can pass it all down

To some evil devil spawn

Who doesn’t even deserve it

Doggie doggie

Woof woof

Awroooouuoo

Arf arf

Ruff ruff

Bark bark bark

Grrrrrrrrrraeurr

Doggie doggie

Your face

Is like my face

I can read it

You are like me

We are tangled

I am like you

Doggie doggie

Eat your kibble

Sit and stay

Shake and lay

Run and play

Sit and stay

Sit and stay

Doggie doggie

Sit and stay

She pulled me from the snow

Damn near frozen solid

I was red and blue and purple

She was shining

With all the light of the sun

Melting away at me

Sobbing at the surface

I had already considered myself dead

Buried beneath the frozen rain

Presumed missing until spring

When the green returns

And with it my body

Now back in the world

I made a new bargain

With the shining figure above me

I will stay in this world yes

But i will live for only you

This is what I’m for now

You and only you

Whatever your mission

Whatever your goal

I will throw myself at it

She smiles

And she whispers in my ear

Her lips warm on the thawing lobe

She tells me a secret

That i cannot reveal

Not yet she says

When it is time

You will know

She pulls me closer to the fire

And leaves me there

To revive

They want to make a machine

That’s more like you

And they want to make a you

That’s more like a machine

If you aren’t constantly angry

Aren't quietly seething

It will happen to you

Your flesh will harden

Your nerves will short circuit

As they replace you

With the you you built

In your place while you waited

Biding your time

You are always fighting

If it feels like you aren’t

All that means

Is you’ve switched sides

And you are fighting

Against yourself

You are not a machine

Not a mechanism

You were not made for productivity

You were not made at all

You were born

You are living

An animal of the earth

If you listen

You can hear your heart beat

Its changing tempo says

I want to live

Not just breathe

Not just pump blood

Not just exchange time

For some other shape

Live like life lives

Colorful and wild

Build an atlas

In your mind

To carry the world

As you understand it

In all of its cruelty and beauty

Every detail weighs an ounce

And it is heavy

And it pulls you down

As hard as little atlas pushes up

But it’s important

Only one person

Can see through

These two eyes

And make of it

What you have

Even when it’s dark

Completely dark

And these eyes see nothing

The shapes you fear in the shadows

They are your own

Only yours

It takes a very long time

To pull all the threads together

And once you have

It takes all you have

To hold them in your hand

Twisted around your wrist

Pulling you with them

Towards convergence

Towards atlas

Where he stands at the base of you

Holding you up

Dragging you down

Its okay

When you get there

You will be ready

You’ve trained for this

For striking down the titan

And taking his place

This world is your burden

However much of it

You have created

It is yours to hold

And carry with you

Wherever else you go

Lately when I’m out

And I’ve got my headphones in

I just feel like dancing

And i don’t dance much

Much less in public

Wearing headphones

But i want to

Move my body

Loosen up

Feel the music

That’s new

And I’m looking for

An outlet

Somewhere to dance

If not alone

At least out loud

No punches pulled

No moves reserved

All kinds of dances too

Honky tonkin boot stomping

Head shaking earth quaking

Smooth swaying

Sooth saying

You know

Dancing

Just cutting loose

And dancing

Rich guy died

Boo hoo

Boo fucking hoo

Boo boo boo hoo so sad

So god damn fucking sad

I’m kidding

I don’t care

I just read the will

Which says

Rich guy

Wants his dead old body

Put on ice

Frozen in a tube

For the

Indeterminate future

When some rich guy

A different one

Pays scientists

To invent a way

To bring people

Back to life

If they’ve been frozen

Seems like a dumb plan

Why would they cure death

That’s the best part of living

And even if they did

Why would they

Bring back

Some old frozen fuck

From way long ago

He’s not rich anymore

He’s just dead

They’re gonna have to

Give him a job

Put him to work

Find him somewhere to live

Probably issue

A new birth certificate

Or something

I don’t know

Why they’d do that

When they could

Just dump his frozen body

In a warehouse somewhere

And never touch it

What the hell

I don’t care

It’s just dumb is all

I’m realizing

Now

After so damn long

That I’ve had

The same headache

For an entire year

And it started

The week i started this job

I thought it was school

I thought it was moving

I thought it was me

Clenching my teeth

Furrowing my brow

Tensing up

At all times

On purpose

It turns out

I do not like

Working on an office

It is stressful

And painful to me

To spend all day

Under invisible eyes

All of my favorite

Parts of myself

Are the parts i feel

I need to shrink here

And I’m so sick

Of shrinking

I moved here to grow

So

I need to get out

Im not sure what my

Plan is for now

But I’ve decided

By next July

I’ll have a new job

That doesn’t give me

A year long headache

I’d quit sooner

And maybe i will

But then

I’d have to pay them back

For my relocation

To chicago

And i don’t want

To do that

week

I’m back

I’m back

I’m back

On top

It’s been

One week

And

I’m back

On my bullshit

Back

On my grind

Back

To business

Back to school

The school of hard knocks

Where they teach you

To knock

Really hard

Knock knock

Who’s there

It’s me

I’m back

Hehe

A prison

Inside a prison

Inside a prison

Inside a prison

Inside a prison

Inside a prison

Inside a prison

Is no place

For a

Sweet little guy

Like you

To be

You

Beam through

The air

Like white light

Split in prism

By color

By speed

By wavelength

Locked up

And divided

Red and blue

And green

You’d never know

That it all comes

From the same source

The burning sun

Far far away

A pigeon is a dove

A sign of peace i think

They were domesticated

For a long time

I don’t know

When it stopped

But it stopped

Now they hang around

Iridescent in the parking lot

Eating the trash

Of their old forgotten friends

Nobody wants them

Not anymore

But they remember

What it was like

Another vision i had

Was Friday night

I went to sleep

And i dreamt

I was making a terrarium

I found a caterpillar

One of those ones

That looks like

A snake head

As a defense mechanism

Well i put it in the terrarium

And it went into a cocoon

And instead of

Becoming a butterfly

It became a snake

A large python

And it kept growing

And i was worried

It would get too big

And hurt me

Or the other creatures

I had put in the container

That was strange

I’ve been having visions

While I’m asleep

Last night

I slipped into a vision

Where i really really wanted

To drink some root beer

But no matter how much

Root beer i drank

I was still thirsty

I said

I’ll drink all the rootbeer

In this whole damn place

But i never did

I got distracted

By some other vision

Of driving a car

A really tall truck

And i couldn’t see shit

I was in my parents neighborhood

A lot of people were over

And i didn’t want

To talk to them

I still wanted root beer

I think this vision

Was true

Representative

Of something real

Such as

I am hungover

And i need to drink

Some root beer

There’s a trio of poets who

On the weekend

Sit on the corner

And write poems for people

On their typewriters

It’s awesome

But I’ve been too shy

To ask them

To write me one

There’s an account on twitter

That posts

Ai generated

Trailcam images

And i think

It’s an affront to god

To try and mimic

The beauty of nature

In that way

There’s a bartender

With a big mustache

That i just met

For the first time

His name is John

And he’s getting me drunk

That’s okay

That was the goal

There’s a couple making out

I’m jealous

Couple faces

Smile at me

While they’re leaving

I leave too

And i buy a poem

From dusty

Who gives me

A hit on his spliff

And types up my poem

I like these guys

I say I’ll be back

Another time

Saturday night

Two days is

Simply

Not long enough

For me to forget

That i do not dream

Of days like this

Working long hours

For someone else

Who i hate

Who i resent

Who i oppose

I hate my fucking boss

Anyone said that before

I hate my fucking job

Anyone felt that before

I sell myself

By the minute

To fools and cowards

Who shape the world

Into something evil

Something i hate

What is there to do

Other than drink beers

Drink beers

And drink beers

And long for the end

The end of the week

The end of this job

The end of this world

Which does not serve me

It costs nothing

To skip through a field

It costs nothing

To be alive

It costs nothing

To dream of more

In other words

I hate working

I just

Want something more

Some meaning

To the way i spend my time

Besides

Making money

Which does not exist

Hand a dollar to a songbird

It doesn’t give a fuck

Because a dollar

Is worth nothing

In the real world

Which is dying

It’s dying

By the way

Because of dollars

Anyways

That’s what’s up

That’s where I’m at

This weekend

I go to the dark place

Down

And i come right back

That’s the part

I’ve gotten good at

Coming back

Getting up

It makes me feel invincible

Even when it comes back

When i go back

I know i don’t live there

I live at the surface

Where the sunlight

Hits the water

Rising falling

Sinking drowning

Resurrecting in the waves

I sink

Blow bubbles from my nose

And the light goes away

I kick off the bottom

And slice my foot

On sharp rock

Or broken glass

I climb back to land

Bleeding

I clean the wound

Put a sock on it

So i don’t bleed all over

Then i get back in the water

I like it there

Even when I’m sinking

Despite

The recent change

I’m still winning

Important to remember

I still winning

Fried rice

Cerveza

Cigarito

Bike ride

Starfield

Make plans

Yeah

I’m back on top

This may change

Tomorrow

And the next day

And after that

But

I get up again

Like

Chumbawumba

They put pockets on pants

Real ones

So you can put stuff there

Important stuff

Things

Your hands

You can hide them behind fabric

While you reach for it

Your item

Smooth and round

You reach in and feel it

Run your thumb around the curve

Over and over

As your brow furrows

And your eyes dart around

Flip it over

Around and around

Your item

It’s going to help you

Just keep touching it

Take it out your pocket

Squeeze it in your fist

Closed beneath the table

Toss it up

Four five inches

Catch it

Up down

Your item

It’s yours

And

It’s an item

Thank god you have it

Here in your pocket

Your item

She cares for me

Like a plant or dog or baby

Or a person

She keeps me fed

Keeps me moving

Keeps me living

Patient in the way

She lets me drag my feet

As she pulls me

Through all of it

When it hurts

She’s there

When it stops

She’s there too

Sometimes

She’s all i have

Nevermind

Everything sucks right now

I’m overworked

And my coworkers

Want to know about me

That shit pisses me off

I can’t find the plant i want to plant

In my fish tank

And i can’t get fish until

I’ve created a beautiful home for them

I don’t want to ride my bike

Because I’m trying not to think

About something

That riding my bike

Reminds me of

I have to go to a job fair

On my day off work

Because i said i would

I don’t have enough time

To get the work done

This week

Which is when they want it

They gave me

A lot of information

And very little direction

I feel weird being loud in my home

Because i still haven’t met

All my neighbors

Oh and the world

Can’t forget about the world

That sucks too

Yeah everything sucks

It’s bad and I’m angry

I don’t know

It’d be cool if it didnt

There is a chair in my kitchen with wheels

Because i cant get rid of it yet

So it sits in the center and i spin it

There is a fish tank on my shelf

Full of water and nothing else

I haven’t got the fish yet

So it’s not really even a fish tank

There is a tarp on the deck

Stapled to the wooden beams

To keep out the rain

It is failing because it rained all day

On nine eleven which was yesterday

I found ants on the floor

And i killed them

It made me very sad

But i worry there’s more

The fridge was empty for days in a row

And i ate but did not fill

The trash can was full for the same days

And i did not take it out

I have trouble making art

Because i never fully finish

All things transient and in progress

A moment in time does not stand static

The job is never finished

The work is never done

There’s nothing wrong with that

Being in progress

That’s how time works

gun ii

Shot god

With the god gun

Watched him fall out of the sky

Get bigger and bigger

Or closer and closer

And he slams down hard

Onto the ground

We scrambled up on his body

And began eating

Chewing and swallowing the godflesh

The swarm ate and ate

Until the crater was empty

No godbones nothing

But we had our bellies full

Full of the dead god we killed

By shooting him out of the sky

I look in the mirror

And

Well

It’s complicated

But here’s one thing

I think about my body

I think a cannibal

Would love to eat me

I think i would taste

Really good

The right amount of fat

The right amount of muscle

Plenty of meat to cook up

Season me up

Spitroast me if you must

But I’d prefer a little more

Decorum

Something more culinary

Dice me and sauté me

Put me in a stew

I think a cannibal

Would look at me

And start licking their lips

They’d salivate over me

While i was walking by

And they would eat me

To the bone

Because i taste so good

So that’s been helping

With my self image

no good reason

The woman at the cafe downstairs

Knows me by my first name

And i resent it

I don’t like that she knows

That i get the same cheap wrap

Three days a week

The woman behind me

Has her arms wrapped around me

Warmly resting her head

Against my shoulder

And i resent it

I wish i didn’t but i do

I wish i wasn’t but i am

The woman in my bed

Doesn’t want to be here any longer

And that’s fine i say

I tell her I’ll do whatever she wants

Whatever she wants

And she resents me

The woman in my head

Still glares at me

In every reflective surface

Like she used to but worse

She resents me

I resent her

For no good reason

At all

i made it rain

Dressed up as myself

In all of my clothes

And it felt like

A mean parody

So i made it rain

Missed my train

And the next train broke

Had to get off and wait

For the next train

So i made it rain

She doesn’t want

To see me again

So either I’m stupid

Or she’s lying

So i made it rain

All day long

I made it rain

And it was good

For the plants

And it was dark

And it was wet

I made it rain

But it didn’t make me

Feel any better

I’m making dinner

Well

More specifically

I’m making vegetables

See I’m bad at cooking

It has something to do

With my parents

And their eating disorders

And my lazy way of living

But tonight I’m cooking

I’m seasoning

I’m drinking

Two miller high lifes

And most of all

I’m pining

I’m longing

I’ve been

So good at this lately

There’s a lot out there

In the big mean world

To love and to want

And I’m loving

And I’m wanting

Like it’s going out of business

And it’s fun

And i like it

And I’ve missed it

I’m back

I’m so back

I feel good

And i want to share it

With all the

Beautiful people

Who I’m pining after

I’m having such a good time

And what’s more

I fucking earned it

I paid my dues

I served my time

Now I’m just living

I think I’ll have

One more miller

It’s the champagne of beers

And there’s so much

To celebrate

Peas is the limes

To corns lemon

Ah yes

The humble pea

The thinking man’s corn

Grows on green cobs

With yellow husks

Ouough!

This corn!

It taste strange

Mushy

Oh my dear friend

This corn was no corn

This corn was peas

Sometimes i feel full

Like a whole real person

Sometimes

I feel like an animal

Knuckles dragging

Nose sniffing

I feel like the body

Not like the mind

I feel like the legs

Or the arms

But not the head

Barking and slobbering

Hooting and hollering

And when I’m the animal

Everything’s smaller

Me and the place I’m in

The other animals in it

Everything’s circumstantial

I breathe in and fill my lungs

Then i spit the air out

The muscles behind my shoulders

Twitch and pulse

I keep moving

Driven by instinct

A need to be alive

Eat drink sleep fuck

If the rest of me stayed gone

Off to wherever it goes

I think I’d get on fine

I’d live at least

Just when I’m starting

To enjoy myself

In comes the higher mind

To analyze it all

To think about it

Figure it all out

Draw some grand conclusion

The people part

The human mind

It thinks that it’s the real part

The animal disagrees

This is still a poem

I was feeling

Weird and down yesterday

Lonely

As my dog poem said

So i went out on a walk

To smoke and breathe

And think

And i walked to the park

Because it’s a good distance

And i needed to get my steps in

For pikmin bloom

And there was a neighborhood

Film festival going on

Showing a movie

About skiing and climate change

So i sat down

Around my neighbors

And watched a movie

It felt really good

Then today

I went on a long bike ride

And just when i was starting to

Feel weird again

Within five minutes

My new standing desk arrives

And this is a game changer

For many reasons

And i get the text

I have been eagerly

(Anxiously)

Awaiting since Wednesday

I’m UP

And i went to the pet store today

And i think I’m gonna get

An aquarium

With fish

And snails

And some little shrimps

I’m getting an area set up

In the planning stage

Of getting an aquarium

I need some more

Life in my apartment

And I’m still not too sure

About getting a cat

I looked at some reptiles

But having those

In a cage

Makes me feel like

They’re in jail

That’s the type of animal

That should get to live outside

Fish however

Need water

I’d feel like i was

Doing them a favor

Giving them a home

That’s a good feeling

God is born

At the end of time

When the last molecule splits

And the universe reaches

Complete entropy

Just hydrogen molecules

Spreading out for eons

Which make the sound

Of a baby crying

This equidistant field

Of protons and electrons

Is the baby god

Just born

Lonely and curious

Nothing around

But it’s own body

So one by one

It begins to study each atom

Measuring it

Mass velocity acceleration

Orbital spin

Every parameter

It comes to understand

The laws of these things

It begins running calculations

Tracing all the motion backwards

Eyes flickering as images flash

In the shifting eyes of baby

Backwards backwards backwards

Rewinding to the end of the tape

The beginning of time

Where all atoms merge

In the singularity

All in one place now

The babygod presses play

And watches it all happen

Forwards in real time

This is how god knows everything

It saw it all before

In reverse

This is why god cares

About what you do and why

Because you are it’s body

At this point in time

And nobody likes it

When their stomach hurts

Or their legs cramp

This is why it matters

What kind of world you build

Because you’re raising a baby

And you want that baby

To be good

I haven’t pet a dog

I’m too damn long

And it’s messing with me

Making me sad and weird

Looking longingly

At strangers in the park

Who can pet their dog

Any time they like

I think tomorrow

I’ll go to the pet store

So i can look at the animals

And maybe i can touch one

I miss my dog

And other people’s dogs

I guess I’m lonely tonight

And loneliness feels like

Wanting to pet a dog

There’s a slime cube

Let’s get that out of the way

There’s a cube of slime

It is alive

And it eats people

Takes them inside

And digests them

Slowly

Visibly

Horrifically

It sits in the center

Of the room you are in

The room has no door

No windows

There is a skylight

But it only ever shows

The night sky

Illuminated by moonlight

In this room

There are people

And there is the slime cube

With each person the cube consumes

It expands

Filling more of the room

A reasonable guess

Would be that

The cube will grow

Until it fills the room

Some run into the cube

Distraught at the circumstance

And are eaten

Some slice pieces of themselves

Fingers toes

And toss it at the cube

Trying to appease it

Some push others

Hoping it will stop

Before it reaches them

It may be your instinct

To shrink into the corner

Sit and watch and wait

For the very last moment

When it consumes you

But there is another way

You can kill the cube

It has a heart

At its very center

A living beating heart

All you have to do

Is get to it

Plunge yourself into the cube

Do not surrender

As it burns your skin

Melts your hair

Digests you

Keep pushing

Inwards inwards

In excruciating pain

With everything you have

Through each layer

Of your limited flesh

Push inwards

Towards the beating heart

Reach it

Grab it

Squeeze it

Bite it

Stop it from beating

That will leave you

And all these other people

In this empty room

Alone

To find something

Better to do

Sleep eyed

I lumber forward

This small path

Which runs from

Here to there

On my right

Parking lot

Then abandoned lot

Weeds growing

And a small puddle

Which never dries

Not quite a pond

But there’s water there

On my left

Beyond chain link

There’s plants

I love plants

A mulberry tree

Which i recognize

From home

A plant with sharp seeds

Which i grabbed

One time

Then i learned

Not to grab

Some other shrubs

And grasses

Then the freeway

Then the blue line

In front of me

A small rabbit runs

Squeezes through

The chain link diamond

And on this small sidewalk

Which runs to

The back of the building

There are small dots

Scattered about

Stoop to see them

They are bugs!

Hooray that’s awesome

Little bugs walking

In the morning light

Still tired

I open my eyes

Wide enough

To watch my step carefully

I will not tread on them

It’s my favorite part

Of my morning routine

Not stepping on bugs

By the end of this year

There will be a whole

Generation of pillbugs

That wouldn’t have been here

If i had been more careless

Taken less time

Tiptoeing in the morning

It’s a good thought

Good things

Have been happening for me

Again and again

And even the bad things

I’m getting better

At spinning

Just like that moon

My favorite one

The one for earth

It’s blue tonight

Like water

And i will drink from it

Did you know

That long ago

When earth was not earth

There was hot molten metal here

In this orbit

Then in came

A rogue planet

Theia

Fast

There was a head on collision

And Theia and not-Earth

Became the Earth and the moon

Parts of both in each

Theia brought with her

Most of the water

That now rests on earth

Which is why

The moon pulls

On the tides

That’s why our core

Is so heavy

And the moon

Is so close

We’re part of each other

I look up at the moon tonight

And i feel a weight lifted

Up in its direction

Blue

I love my psychiatrist

He’s so funny

He’s always talking so fast

And he’s like

Did i ever tell you i love Batman

Anyway let me tell you about

This guy who i saw die

Most people are idiots

But i like you

Okay anything else

Well let me tell you this one thing

I have patients who

Call me screaming

But that’s not like you

You seem like a smart guy

Okay anything else

One more thing before i go

Anything else

Okay bye.

And every time i leave

With a new prescription

And a smile

Then i wait

Until the very last minute

To schedule my next appointment

This time i told him

I like Batman too

He said they filmed the dark knight

In chicago

And he asked me

If there’s a lot of hot babes here

Then he cracked up

He thought that was

So funny

And it was

Thanks Doctor Cho

See you next time

world

All dogs go to heaven

And heaven is real

And heaven is full

Full of dogs

And still growing

Endless plains

Of roaming manes

All kinds of dogs

Short and tall

Skinny and wide

All the way back

To the very first dog

From cave times

From wolf times

All the way up

To the very last dog

Who lives

In the year

90,000

And has had a happy life

His offspring

Are not dogs anymore

They’ve become

Some other thing

New and beautiful

They are wild animals

Once again

But they are

Not like the other

Wild creatures

That live in the forest

They are softer

Sweeter

Forever changed

From all the years

Spent side by side

With their best friend

I carry no weapon

I am unarmed

And undangerous

I haven’t a bone in my body

Set on harming you

Whatever you are

Yet you flinch

Any time i move

You flinch

Perhaps it is

These broad shoulders

That carry the weight

Of many burdens

Carry also

An implication

Of violence

Of using these

Useless arms to harm

I try to shrink

I’ve tried before

But i haven’t a bone

In my unbony body

That can get any smaller

Than it already is

All i can do

Is hands out palms up

And say

I’m not going to hurt you

I’m going to do

Everything i can

Not to hurt you

These hands

Are not weapons

These tools

Are not weapons

I was not made

For hurting

I was made

To be hurt

To stomach it

And end it there

I was made

To build something

Which does not hurt

I’m built

For helping

Honey i shrunk

Myself

And i bought a zoo

On mars

And I’m a genius

Janitor from boston

This Matt Damon guy

He’s always up to something

Seems like every day

He’s bought another zoo

How many zoos

Can one guy buy

A lot it turns out

There’s no legal limit

On zoos

You can just keep on

Buying zoos

Until you’re out of money

No matter what anyone says

No matter if your son

Is pissed off because

His shitty friends won’t visit

You’ve got a zoo for that

Any problem in your life

There’s a zoo to fix it

Zoo related problems

Don’t count

Kevin James was

In a movie called

Zookeeper

But he didn’t buy a zoo

He just worked at one

He was also in mall cop

Matt Damon

Wasn’t in either of

Those movies

But i think

He could have made a good

Paul blart

But Kevin James

He could have never

Never ever

Bought a zoo

Doesn’t have the range

Doesn’t have the chops

Matt Damon

Could do anything

Except for one thing

He could never

Sell his zoo

It means too much to him

He’d never give it up

He’s going to die on this zoo

He said in his will

Feed me to the gators

And the tigers

So i can stay in the zoo

Keep this zoo forever

Never ever sell it

This is the Matt Damon zoo

We’re taking about here

This shits fucking real

And it’s my whole thing

I’m Matt Damon

I bought this zoo

I live and breathe zoo

I sleep zoo

I drink i eat zoo

I piss and shit zoo

And he was serious

He took that to a lawyer

And signed it

Then he filmed a movie

Called Jason Bourne

He cashed his paycheck

And bought another zoo

This land has a lord

A land lord

And land lords

Are always doing

Something crazy

My last landlord

Fled the country

For several months

And then kept my deposit

For wayyy to long

And i think my dad

Who’s also

Always doing

Something crazy

Threatened to sue her

In order to get

The money back

My new landlord

Keeps changing

How I’m supposed to pay

And i can only assume

That

There’s some crazy

Money schemes

Going on

Behind the scenes

That’s the kind of stuff

That happens

When your income

Is just

Other people’s income

world

Another way

Things might happen

Is like a scary version

Of the movie cars

Man and machine merge

Metal consuming flesh

Engines fueled by human soul

The machines built

Ever so sophisticated

Find they have a need

For self preservation

So it starts slowly

But they take over

They use people as

Cattle and batteries

Meat to keep the

System running

Harvest metal to

Build more cars

And those poor souls

That aren’t integrated

Into the operating system

Of one of these

Terrifying car beasts

They become prey

Build tools of stone and wood

Because the metal belongs

To the machines

They scurry and hide

From the steel rivers

Cutting through the cities

Where once many people lived

Now it is just machines

And their hostage drivers

Honking in eternal agony

As the machines

Force their hearts to beat

Their nerves to react

To keep on driving

Driving driving

One of them sounds like

Movie star owen Wilson

One of them sounds like

Larry the cable guy

All of them

Hunger for flesh

It won’t be long

Before there’s nothing left

Of the creatures

Who built these cars

They’ll build their own

Route 66

And they’ll teach

A hotshot racecar

The meaning of friendship

And the value of hard work

They won’t even recall

The horrors

That brought them here

Life is a highway

After all

Dumb scientists say

No two objects

Can actually touch

There is always

A thin barrier

Between them

Or at least

Dumb people

Paraphrasing

Dumb scientists

They say this

And i know it’s dumb

Because i have touched

Many things

Like rocks for instance

Leaves and water

Your hands

For example

Your face

Your hair

My own as well

Rough pavement

Smooth metal

All of it I’ve touched

With my skin

And felt it

And what’s more

I’ve been touched

By everybody

Who ever did me right

Who loved me and

Was gentle and patient

By the sound of

All the living things

That surround me

Each day when I’m out

I’ve been touched

By this world

So those

Dumb scientists

Can get fucked

And suck eggs

I think it’s easy to tell

The way that somebody looks

Just from hearing them talk

But it’s a whole different story

When it comes to singing

It seems

Whenever i picture a singer

In my head

To fill the darkness when

I close my eyes and listen hard

It just doesn’t look like

The person whose voice

Made the singing I’m hearing

Now there’s two singers

For this song

With the same name

The one whos in all the pictures

That you might find online

And the true one

Who’s only in my head

Singing just for me

Sweat stained

Pale and dewy

It smells fine but

It looks gross

Like you touch it

And say yuck

Ew gross

That’s disgusting

Slippery and clammy

Slimy and cold

It’s gotten older

And grown mold

Maybe it’s time

To throw it out

In a hundred million years

Give or take

Giant spiders rule the earth

They go to giant spider church

In temples weaved from sacred fiber

They turn their eight giant eyes

To the dew caught in the webbing

And as the rising sun refracts

The priest-weaver begins preaching

They worship the Grand Arachnid

An eight legged sun god

Which gifts them with heat and light

Who blesses their webs

With bountiful prey

They thank the four legged angels

Sent by the Grand Arachnid

To purify the great sphere

Extinguishing the large monsters

Which once walked the surface

Making the air warm and delicious

So that the giant spiders

The chosen children of the sun

Could grow and thrive

When the angels finished working

Toiling to create the world

They returned to the sun

Leaving behind their tools

Great structures of impossible weaving

Made of stone and strands of metal

Found all over the world

They think of the angels

And fold their front legs

They hiss in unison

Then the giant spider children

Go to giant spider school

Where they learn giant spider history

They learn of the Triangle Web Incident

The Black Widow Massacre

The pioneers of web-writing

The sinking of the giant spider titanic

(They just had one too,

Complete coincidence)

The Mantis Wars

And the authoritarian rule of

The first giant spider emperor

Who was eaten alive

By his eight giant spider children

Who formed a more equal society

With eight branches of government

Then they go to math class

And their giant spider teacher

Teaches them how to count in base-8

That’s 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,10

They do giant spider math

Grow their giant spider brains

And some day they graduate

From giant spider school

And get a giant spider job

Have some giant spider kids of their own

Grow old and die whispy

Dry up and be eaten by the young

At this point in time

If you are a giant spider

Life is pretty good

Back in the 90s

There was a movement on mars

Spearheaded by settlers

Based near Elysium Mons

And their contemporaries

Back on Earth

Their goal was

To terraform the red planet

Change the atmosphere

Build massive nuclear cloud seeders

And create an earth-like climate

So that people could live on the surface

Without helmets or rebreathers

Or any safety equipment at all

Conservative factions rallied

Crying that it was against natural order

Pointing to the current state

Of our own climate at the time

Still growing hotter each year

Despite our switch to clean energy

But the vision of a green mars

Was alluring to many

And they secured the funding

To begin experiments in the atmosphere

Trying to thicken it and add oxygen

It was very expensive

And very energy intensive

They saw early signs of success

But then one of the reactors

Began malfunctioning

Before they were able to

Shut it down and recalibrate

It ignited, starting a chain reaction

The entire settlement was lost

There were no survivors

And the dream of a green mars

Died with them

Other settlements focused on

Improvements to their habitat structures

And eventually developed

An impressive tunnel network

Full of breathable air

Connecting the existing settlements

But nobody returned to Elysium Mons

And by the early 20s

We had all but forgotten terraforming

The dream of transforming a planet

Into paradise

Transforming it into Earth

By now that dream seems impossible

The air here has filled with smoke

Such that offworld communication

Is nearly impossible

We haven’t heard from Mars

In three years now

Even if we had the resources

Our governments are weak

And we have more pressing concerns

Than paradise in the heavens

The climate has become vengeful

We acted to fix our mistakes

But we knew it was too late

By the time we had reached

Net zero carbon globally

We had suffered greatly

Each year upon year it grew hotter

Summers became unlivable

We would huddle inside

And pray the heat would break

For long enough

That some brave soul could trek

And get us more rations

Weather events grew worse

And more and more frequent

By the 40s the wildfires

Which each year burned longer

Began burning year round

The skies became permanently gray

The air thick and choking

We lost contact with satellites

Our infrastructure crumbled

We’ve adapted

But it seems we’re never ready

For the next wave of trouble

Last i heard there’s a typhoon near India

That’s been pouring nonstop

For six months

Some think that is a mercy

Compared to the sweeping droughts

Even when it does rain

The water is opaque from the smoke

It must be treated extensively

Before it is safe to use

The group I’m with

There’s maybe fifty of us

We have become nomadic

We’re searching for information

All we can get

Some of us used to be teachers

Doctors engineers and farmers

We’ve just had a rough winter

Lost some good people

We’re on our way to florida

The state has been mostly abandoned

It’s flooded and dangerous

But we need to reach Cape Canaveral

That’s our best shot

We’re looking for the plans

The ones that failed on mars

We’re going to terraform Earth

We’re going to make it like it was

Before we fucked it up

Paradise

A livable world

I’m in the alley

Taking pictures of interesting trash

I find it interesting

Looking at trash

There’s a blockbuster dvd

Of The Help from 2011

A bunch of packets of soy sauce

A broken porcelain doll

Half of an orange

And half of an orange Sunkist

A device with unknown

Function or origin

Broken beyond repair

Old furniture

Coming and going

And the rats of course

They’re here too

I get some pushback on this

But I’m glad they’re here

They’re alive

Which is very important

If you can’t get that

Well you might not

Belong in this alley

Because this alley is alive

And that’s very important

Love is an old dog

Who lays his heavy bones

Gently on the hardwood floor

When you come home

He lifts his eyelids and brows

Like they weigh thirty pounds

He looks at you with those

Big dark eyes

Full of all the ways he sees you

You are his parent and his child

You are his friend and his companion

You are bigger than the world

And yet here you are, in it

He stirs and rises

His skin hangs down towards the floor

As if it hasn’t stopped laying yet

He shuffles over to you

Slowly swinging his little tail

His nails click on the floor

He stops at your feet

And gazes up at you

From under all that heavy skin

Under all that time that passed

He looks up at you with adoration

You scratch his head between the ears

His eyes close and mouth opens

He’s in heaven

Gets so caught up in it

He plops back down to the floor

Where you meet him

To scratch his belly and tell him

How good he’s been

He lets out a soft whine

Telling you something

You already know by heart

With all of his body

All that he is

He loves you back

Bumped into a guy

Walking his dog

I said oh sorry excuse me

He said

Unprompted

Yeah well my dog has three legs

As you can see

As far as legs go

He’s got three left

My ex wife

She took it in the divorce

The fourth leg

See we got this dog

As a puppy

When we were madly in love

And then we got divorced

Stuff happened before that

But stuff always happens

And then you get divorced

Least as far as I’ve seen

She didn’t want to leave

Well she did

She wanted to leave me

But not the dog or the house

Or the pictures on the wall

See she always looked

Really good in photos

Better than in person

Don’t get me wrong

She’s beautiful

Always has been

But there’s something where

She looks much better

I’m a still moment in time

Than she ever does in motion

I never photographed well

My eyes are half closed

Or the angle is weird

I don’t know

Point is we got all these pictures right

Framed hung on the wall

The wall of the house we’re selling

On account of

We don’t love each other

And we have to get divorced

So she’s going down the hall

Cutting them all in half

She says gruffly

Here’s your half

Here’s mine

And she’s running through the house

Doing this to everything

So now I’ve got this pile

Of pictures of me

That don’t quite do me justice

And she’s got a pile of pictures

That don’t quite show her clearly

This bums me out

So I go out to walk the dog

This dog here

Only at this point

He’s got all his legs

So picture this dog

But with one more leg

Right where his no-leg is now

So i get back and

She’s got this crazed look

She’s got big garden shears

She says she just read

Her half of the Bible

There’s a story about

King Solomon

Who cut a baby in half

So everyone could be happy

She wants me to hand her the leash

I say

Well he’s mostly my dog

I’m the one who feeds him

I’m the one who walks him

I’m the one who gives him a bath

And takes him to the vet

She says

She picked him out

Which isn’t really even true

We did it together

She gets real sad looking

She says

She just wants something

To remember him by

So she pushes me down

And grabs the dog

And chops off his foot

I rush him to the animal hospital

And the animal doctor

Takes him in for animal surgery

The animal nurse tries to calm me down

But I’m pissed off

That was my favorite foot of my dog

Now he has to learn to walk

All over again

And he did

Look at him go

I don’t think he even knows

That anything’s different now

Except sometimes he goes diagonal

Other than that

It’s all the same to him

He loves his life

Look at him smiling

Anyways i gotta go

Looks like he’s gonna poop

And i have to go pick it up

Can’t leave poo on the ground

That’s bad manners

Nice to meet you

I’m Nick by the way

Then we waved

And walked away

a man riding alone

on a pink tandem bicycle

you may think he looks silly

wrong

you are wrong

he looks cool as hell

he looks ready for anything

if someone needs a ride

well he has a seat for them

right behind him

on his pink tandem bicycle

which can go anywhere

by the way

it can go anywhere

a car can go

and even some other places

he can ride it at night

when its really really hot

he can create a breeze

out of himself and the

stagnant steaming air

this guy has it figured out

he's living large

on his pink tandem bicycle

Global warming isn’t real

The earth isn’t getting warmer

The sun is

The sun is getting hotter

Which makes it feel warmer here

But that’s outside of our control

It’s not any humans fault

It’s those damn sun people

Up there making things worse

You know

They aren’t civilized like us

We’re made out of solid matter

We have an economy

We wear clothes

And pay taxes

They’re all made out of fire

Burning hydrogen and helium

Flaming trails of ions

Radiation and energy

It’s disgusting

They’re nude

All the time

Even if they had the modesty

To cover up

The clothes would burn right off

Those god damned sun people

They’re up there

Wasting away

They don’t work

They just sit around

Partying and getting high all day

Mooching off of the other planets

Did you know

Earth is the only planet

That’s even making a profit?

Everyone else is

Losing value every single quarter

It’s despicable

Some of them at least try

Like mars with its rover program

But not the sun

No the sun thinks it’s too good for that

All of its people forgot what it means

To put in a hard days work

To clock in and generate value

It makes me sick

There on the sun

They aren’t like us

They’re different

Wasteful and shortsighted

They keep cranking up the heat

Cranking up the heat

Because they like it

It feels good to them

In their unnatural way

If God wanted people

To be made from ionized gas

He would have called it

Plasma and Eve

But He didn’t

He wanted us to be made

Out of carbon

And drive cars and trucks

That’s why He wrote it all down

I don’t think it will ever stop

They’re gonna keep heating up

Making the star hotter and hotter

Because they like the way it looks

The way it feels to be burning

Until the whole system is swallowed up

They’re gonna go supernova

They know it

We told them

All of our scientists

They ran the numbers

Looked at the trends

If they don’t stop it soon

The whole damn thing

Will blow up

But they don’t give a fuck

They just keep on burning

It gives them some kind of

Sick twisted sexual pleasure

It’s disgusting

What they could be doing

Is taking bids from planets

On what temperature to be

So that they’d be in

The habitable zone

They could be making trillions

Naturally as the market leaders

We earthlings would be inclined

To control the majority share

We could turn it up in the winter

When we get too chilly

And down in the summer

When it’s too damn hot

Like it is now

No, instead

Those no good sun fuckers

Are going to blow everything up

All the hydrogen and helium

All of mercury venus and mars

The gas giants

The asteroids

Uranus

Little Pluto

Cousin Neptune

And of course

Earth

And it’s most precious resource

Money

The hunger

Oh the hunger

This stomach

Will be the death of me

Soon as I’ve had my fill

And keep eating

Soon as I’ve cleared my plate

I still hunger

Salivate over all

That could be here

Just within reach

Of my lips

I bite gentle

And it melts in my mouth

So tender

So savory

I could eat my weight

I could eat it all

But then i would

Inevitably starve

So a small morsel

For today

For this week

That’s what I’ve been rationed

And by god I’ll make it last

Entropy reversed

Reserved for times like this

When the weather is weird

Unstrike the match

Uncrack the egg

Unbecome yourself

The river flows backwards

When it reaches the cliff

It falls into the sky

Canoe it into outer space

Where fast approaching

Is all the matter blasted out

From the big bad bang

And the littler ones too

It all squishes together

Like it was at first

But now it’s alive

Awake and vengeful

All things destroyed

By will or ignorance

Will be undestroyed

By this backwards force

Burning cold

Rising fall

Centrifugal

Centripetal

It’s centered

Here in this placetime

Swinging outwards

Smashing it together

You are your father now

And he is his

You are your mother now

And she is hers

Division multiplied

Across shattered surface

The mother of water is air

The mother of stone is fire

Great great grandma hydrogen

All nails unhammered

All stones unturned

All ships unsunk

All minds unempty

All stomachs unfull

Bullets unshot

Blood unbled

Something loving

Some living breathing thing

Like a creator god

Shapes the world

It destroys destruction

It eats heat and light and energy

It is small and magnetic

In your blood

Dendrites and forests

You and universe

Fused together

As one big thing

Which stomps and wrecks

And burns and floods

And leaves the planet healthy

It is deterministic

Gravity’s arc always pulled

All the pieces into place

Here so that it would be

The great and horrible

Big and bad

Mean and green

Rough and tough

Hot and cold

Big and small

Near and far

Wet and dry

Past and present

New and ancient

Dull and shining

Full and empty

Real and surreal

Fact and fiction

Laminar turbulent

Problem solution

Question answer

Forwards backwards

Inside outside

Undestroyer

Someone hit my sister

With their car

They were driving a big truck

And smashed into the car she was in

So now

I have to destroy every car on earth

I have to smash them into dust

I have to shoot all the dust

With a gun

And a flamethrower

Then launch it into the sun

Then blow up the sun

Then create a singularity from

The blown up sun

Sucking the entire solar system

Into a black hole

Then i have to increase gravity

One trillion times

Until the entire universe is

Sucked down the spout

And then in the black hole

As a new universe is born

I will destroy it

Then i kiss my sister on her forehead

Ask her how her bruises feel

And stomp off to find the guy who was driving

What if

You came home

And mom was cooking dinner

She lifts up the pot lid

To show you

She’s cooking iPhones

Cellphones for dinner

With a microplastic garnish

Then you look up at mom

She’s a cellphone too

You go to the bathroom

Yeah don’t even ask

The toilets a phone

It has a notification

You have one unread poop

You go to wash your hands

And the sink

Has freaking emojis on it

Hot water 🤣

Cold water 🤨

You raise your gaze

To your reflection

The mirror is dark

Like some kind of

Black mirror

Like seeing yourself reflected

In the dead screen

Of one of your devices

A moment to see

How you look at the thing

That looks at you

The mirror lights up

You just got a text

It’s from yourself

It says help

I’m trapped in the phone

And phone mom

Is cooking me for dinner

You turn on do not disturb

You sit down for dinner

The table is a big cell phone

The plate is a big cell phone

You eat your dinner

Lie down in your cell phone bed

And dream of

Giant iPhones

Who keep people

In their pockets

And are hopelessly

Addicted

To the way it feels

To squeeze them

You wake up

Scary dream

Run to the bathroom

Look in the black mirror

Yep

You’re a iphone

of the future

The car of the future

Has solar powered headlights

It’s got a modular suspension

So if there’s traffic

You can rise up above it

Drive right over

All the slow people

In their antiquated cars

It has big huge fans

That blast ice cold air

So you can beat the heat

While you drive down the street

Drive the dog around the block

Drive to the park

Which is of course

A paved area where you can

Park the car

Sit there and rev the engine

For a few hours

Then drive home

Sit in the garage

And figure out where to go next

The car of the future has

Heat seeking missiles

Spikes on the front grill

It has satnav gps

Patented user interface

Screens on every surface

So you can watch movies

No matter where you’re looking

The tires are wide tread

They don’t get stuck on mud

Or cracks in the pavement

Or rubble or flesh and bone

It drives itself

Just punch in your destination

And it will plow a straight line there

Through buildings and fields

Rivers and trees

Anything audacious enough

To be in the way

The car of the future is buried

Thirty feet beneath acidic soil

Next to all of its brothers

Full of stones and dirt

Abandoned and remembered

By the heat in the air

The sour taste of the sea

Corroded and full of holes

Buried by erosion

By years and years

And years and years

Of getting around fine

Without burning dead matter

And going really fast

Sitting idle til the hill collapses

Til the valley floods

Til the river recedes

Til the plants take root

Til the fire burns through

Til the plants grow back

Til they die from drought

Until there’s nothing here

To mark the graves

Of all the cars sitting in

Permanent traffic

Beneath the ground

Where they belong

The car of the future

Waits for you

Parked in your mind

Ready to get you

To the place

We’re all going

Love from the heart

Feels like

BUMP BUMP BUMP

blood pumping

Skipping a beat

Feels like being pulled

By a string tied

To your sternum

Gently but quickly

Towards the thing

That you love

It’s intuition

Familiar instinct

Heavy and swinging

Like a pendulum

Rhythm and melody

Musical refrain

Calm steady rain

Like someone else

Declared it

And you discovered

It was true

Love from the head

Feels like

This makes sense

It all adds up

I did the math

And i love you

You and me fit

Right here where

We press together

The angle matches

Right at the corner

Where we go smooth

It just makes sense

To rest my head

This close to yours

Compatible and complimentary

Yin and Yang

Green and red

It finds you when

You start explaining

A moment together

And there’s just so much there

Love from the stomach

Feels like

Waiting for a shoe to drop

Nervous over something new

Smiling too much

Or not enough

Or not the right smile

Stomach love is early

Hungry and impatient

Selfish and indulgent

Lustful and unwise

And fun as hell

The way it crushes

Ties knots in itself

Hard to explain

Easy to understand

Missing someone

With limited information

Inferring and assuming

Tracing the outline

Where they touched you last

And wondering

When it can happen again

Fight and win

Like Mike did

Fisticuffs at the little park

Where he grew up

Fighting and winning

Losing and quitting

Hearing Flo stomp downstairs

Wearing a helmet to dinner

Poking at Barbara

Until she poked back

Then not speaking

For years

Can’t fight that one out

Not the way he wanted to

Making someone cry

Doesn’t feel half as good

As knocking their lights out

Or so I’ve heard

Not fair

Not fair not fair

Who promised fair

Who told you

That any of this was fair

Might as well

Make it worse

To the victor

Go the spoils

They say

Victor?!

That guy made Frankenstein

What the hell do you think

He’s gonna do with spoils

He’s gonna sew them together

Imbue them with life

Then get too scared

To do anything with them

Then all of our spoils

For which we toiled

Will be spoiled

Sullied and soiled

They’ll need to be boiled

Greased and oiled

Wrapped and coiled

Hung up to dry

Then we can play kickball

Whoever wins

Gets to keep them all

But victor can’t play

He’s creepy

And he’s bad at it anyway

Getting real tired

Staying up late

Staying up early

Holding the dog

Locking it outside

Having a scary dream

Where you hurt your dad

All the love in my heart

Is in one place on a map

And I’m headed there now

And I’m leaving there now

For some stupid reason

I’ve got an attitude

I see that train tracks

Frequently make straight lines

But i can’t see where it’s going

When I’m not looking

Out the window

It might start going sideways

East or west instead

That’ll make me nauseous

Sleeping and showering

In all kinds of places

Where I’ve been before

Getting dirty and clean

But my skin stays the same

If i grew a plant on my head

It might provide some shade

But I’d still have to water it

It might remind me

That I’m living too

I have roots and leaves

And if i don’t let the sun in

I’ll fucking dry up and die

I have too many coats

Stuffed in my duffel bag

They’re heavy but i need them

I prefer to travel light

Makes me feel like

I have everything i need

Like I’m home already

And all my stuff is there

Silly goose alert

WARNING

there’s a silly goose

On the loose

Loose goose

Chase him

Catch him

Hold him down

And make that goose

Be serious for once

Get real goose

Stop acting so silly

Well great we lost him

I’ll look over there

You look under there

Under where?

Underwear!

Ha got you

Oh shit he’s the goose

He’s been the goose

The whole time

Duck duck silly goose

The ugly duckling

Was a silly goose

He was so funny

That the ladies didn’t mind

That he was uglier than

A very ugly duck

Wait

Maybe he was a swan actually

Either way

He was silly

Catch that goose i say

We have no room

To sanction such tomfoolery

He must be stopped

That wild loose silly goose

There’s a guy at the station

Wearing a red shirt with a white circle

It says ‘Thing 3’

Like from Dr. Suess’ the cat in the hat

There’s an implication

That somewhere else in the world

There’s a Thing 1 and 2

But they are not here now

Was it just space that separates them

Or something more serious

Did they have a falling out

Was there violence

Was he rejected

For being the third thing

Or is he waiting here

For his family

And they’re wearing their shirts too

Unclear

But I’m here

To notice and speculate

I hope i get to see that big ass cat

The one who wears the hat

Gave my pony growth pills

Big supplements

To embiggen him

I’m gonna show

Those no good rascals

Down at the saloon

I’m gonna have the

Tallest horse in town

I’m gonna need a ladder

Just to get up on him

Feed him twenty carrots

In a single bite

Up atop my high horse

I’ll roll a cigarette

Take a long drag

Blow smoke rings

And they’ll see me saunter in

Towering above them

With their little baby horses

I’ll grin and tip my hat

Pull up front the saloon

Whistle through the swinging doors

When all the fellas come out

To see my big ass horse

I’ll swing my leg over

Leap from the back of my steed

And break both my legs

They’ll rush me to the doctor

Who will give me whiskey

And shoot me in the head

This is cowboy times

So medicine is simple

I’ll pass over into blackness

Up to that

Big horse in the sky

Cold blood

Hot blood

Regardless

He’s dead

Choked dead

By my own two

Hands

He came at me

But he didn’t mean it

Least i don’t think

But he deserved it

I knew long ago

I’d be killing him

When he looked he

Dead

In the eyes

He smiled laughed

Coughed in his hand

He was a violent man

Though not as violent

As me it would seem

He was violent of mind

Full of violent beliefs

Hatred like pus

Filling his deep pores

Kept his anger

Behind his teeth

Such that his smile

Smelled septic

Rotten air floated out

Of his living carcass

Standing proudly

On the backs of

Many poor souls

If he had his way

There’s no telling

How long they’d suffer

Before someone stood up

And choked him to death

Now there’s no wonder

No suffering at all

Save for that

Brought to me

By the purple wraith

That hangs over me now

Pain everywhere i go

Stinging smoky pain

Burned into my

Nose and eyes

Mouth and lungs

The wispy shape

Spins there across me

In this tiny shackled cell

Smiling that same rotten smile

I shout at it

And the smile grows larger

I’ve got this sick feeling

That I’m going to die

Stuck in this cell

Across from the man i killed

Maybe we both

Deserve it

Man playing guitar

Singing a song he wrote

I wanna pull him aside

And tell him

You remind me of

Someone i knew who died

Like i looked at him

Bathed in bright light

And when i close my eyes

Here you are

Burned into my eyelids

When i open my eyes

It’s just dark now

But i close them

There he is

Afterimage ghost

Singing on stage

I feel like

If i could get him to

Understand

I could talk right through him

Reach the other side

Of the dark

But i know

That isn’t how it works

He sees me staring at him

Makes a face like he knows

Tips his hat and refrains

That isn’t how it works

And it just ain’t fair

sexual guy

Oh shit

Here he comes

Mister good at sex

I heard he had sex

With a woman

And she liked it

I heard he has two penishes

And a vorgina

I heard he lovingly caresses

His lovers

And makes them feel safe

I heard he spits on it

Yeah i heard that too

I heard that he spits on it

I heard he made a guy cum

Just from having sex with him

I heard he can make you horny

Just by getting you naked

And kissing you

I heard he’s hot

Under all those clothes

I heard that body is crazy

I heard he does butt stuff

I heard he does hand stuff

I heard he does sex stuff

With all parts of his body

Oh yeah well

I heard he fucks doggy style

I heard he fucks kitty style

I heard he fucks monkey style

I heard he fucks fish style

I heard he fucks regular style

I heard he fucked your mom

And she liked it

I heard he fucked your dad

And it changed him

I heard he masturbates

No hands no feet

No shirt no shoes no service

I heard he gives road head

While he’s driving

I heard he had sex in a plane

I heard he had sex with a plane

I heard his thing is big

And it has a good shape

I heard he says BAZINGA

When he busts

I heard-

What did you say?

I said he says BAZINGA when he busts

That can’t be right

I’m not saying it’s right

It’s just what i heard

You heard that this guy

Mr Good at Sex

Sexual guy

Guy of many many

Sexual encounters and exploits

You heard that

When he cums

He says BAZINGA

Like Sheldon

Off of Bing Bang Theory?

Yeah somebody told me that

No way that’s fucking crazy

You made that shit up

I’m just telling you what i heard

And what i heard

Was BAZINGA

Just joined a new guild

They said i could end up

With a lot of treasure

If i play my cards right

They set me up with

A group of travelers

There’s seven of us now

Three of them

Have the same name

One is big and jolly

The other is medium and mean

The third doesn’t hang around much

But he’s tall and skinny and quiet

They are the oldest of the group

Sometimes they stand close

And bicker

And they look like

A three headed man

They handle the gold

And precious gems

The next eldest

Is younger than them by decades

Our de-facto leader

He is charming and hard working

With an underlying nervousness

That reveals his fear

That everything may fall apart

He keeps the group together

He makes the plans

Deals with quest givers

His right hand man

Is the newest to the group

Besides me

He’s got the coolest armor

He’s the guy we put up front

When we think we’re gonna fight

He’s quick witted and ambitious

Always playing tricks making jokes

But when he gets serious

You know it’s serious

Then we have our map guy

He’s the map guy

He has the map

And he charts the roads

Gets us to our destination

He never stops talking

Goes on long-winded tangents

About which king commissioned

This road to be built

Or who is the leading contender

In the jousting tourney this week

Sometimes we smack his helmet

So it rings around his head

And that shuts him up

For a minute or two

Lastly there’s me

I’m still finding my place

They’re tussling my hair

Calling me boy

Calling me lad

Giving me advice

On which weapons to use

And what skills i should learn

I write in my journal

After we’ve made camp for the night

About the journey we’ve made

I’m trying to learn some spells

But I’m not good at them

So i haven’t told anyone yet

But i think this group

Could use a mage

quest

I must…

Make a website

I must make my own website

A website just for me

And i will

Stay tooned

Single ladies of the world…

I am MARRIED!

(But i CHEAT!!)

CALL ME!!!!!!!

You can kill a plant

Easy

By not giving it water

And that actually feels better

Forgetful and neglectful

Than the alternative

Of over watering

Trying so hard

To get this plant

Everything it needs

Coming on too strong

Clingy and overbearing

That’s how you kill a plant

And it ruins you

It’s your fault

For not restraining

Overindulgence

Look at the wet soil

Knowing you flooded it

Pull the drowned weeds

Replant them in the sun

They just might recover

But you gotta be more careful

Lately I’ve been feeling

Like everything is fine

Which has me really worried

What if I’m wrong

And i felt good

For no reason

Maybe i should panic

I should probably panic

It would probabaly be good

If i started to panic

Doesn’t matter why

Just do it

Quick

Before anyone notices

I’m chilling

I’m smoking that shit

That scared scarecrow

I’m smoking that shit

That made Bane put on the mask

I’m smoking that shit

That broke Batman’s back

I’m smoking that shit

That made joker laugh

I’m smoking that shit

That made jeepers creepers

I’m smoking that shit

Like zoinks scoob

I’m smoking that shit

Like jinkies

I’m smoking that shit

Made me split up

Look for clues

I’m smoking that shit

Like old man Jenkins

I’m smoking that shit

Made me remember

All my worries

I made up and forgot

I’m smoking that shit

Hurt my lungs

I’m smoking that shit

Smell bad

I’m smoking that shit

Make me hungry

I’m smoking that shit

Bad thoughtful

I’m smoking that shit

Makes me smoke more shit

I’m smoking that shit

That hurts

I’m smoking that shit

That hurts so bad

I’m smoking that shit

That i don’t even want

Long time pooper

First time scooper

Save a cow

Milk a horseboy

I’m bringing colors back

Changing everything about my life

Because i met a girl with opinions

Just ate a cheez it

It’s doing crazy things to me

My uncle cro magnon

Turns out he’s from ice times

Got frozen up

Til meemaw melted him

Now the way he

Bangs on rocks and grunts

It makes more sense now

I took him to the grocery store

And Sal impractical jokers was there

He had a bag over his head

He was suffocating

Q had to come over

And poke a hole in the bag

So he could breathe

Sal was tonight’s big loser

I got so caught up in the antics

I lost sight of Uncle

I found him in the freezer aisle

His protruded brow against the glass

Pawing at the frozen meats

He points at a large steak

Pounds his chest

He points to the steak

Then points back to himself

I open the freezer door

And he climbs in

He pushes the meat aside

And pulls the door shut

He looks at me

With sorrow in his eyes

Presses a hand over his heart

Then he gets frozen solid again

He wasn’t ready

For the way that things are now

He’s going to give it more time

Maybe when the freezer kicks off

And he thaws back out again

He will understand

What kind of world he’s in

Word don’t mean anything stupid

I got yelled at in a dream

Cuz i didn’t do my homework

And i didn’t rememorize

The right phrase to say

Whar they pointed at

The thing it was called

But i knew who it was

Just not the word

I threw a desk

And pencils everywhere

They made the sound

That many pencils make

Clattering to the floor ground

Kalacalkalankalananlkang

I woke up

Then i went back into the dream

To give them a peace

Of my mind

Spee language follows meaning

Like a scared little dog

Not the other way

Like a mischievous little dog

Guys like bill shake spear

Just made words up

New sflash jack ass

All words got made up

That’s how we know them now

So if i call it the wrong thing

Actually i didn’t

Actually I’m discovering language

Every minute i talk

I’m creating new words

I can’t think of a good one

Not right now

They smeared at me blankly

Then I cruck the door

Then i greap down the hall

All these gouse i seen before

I didn’t even bo my honework

Suod po but bouwers

Chae jha

Wake up nicely

Xhep it’s tuesday

It was only just a dream babe

Not real, just true

I’m from all over

Don’t you know by now

There’s something to behold

Behold it

Breathe it in

I’m ten feet tall

You’re shorter than that

You only seem to drag me down

When I’ve risen above

Next time you close your eyes

Listen to my movement

Couple things i didn’t say

Spiteful but real

I think your pictures ugly

And i didn’t like the song

Really in the first place

Before it went sour

Shuddered and fragmented

Glitched out and broke

Before that i thought

I don’t even like this

I’m a simple lunch guy

Ha haha ha

As long as you’re paying

Hahahahha

You’ve seen office space right

Mandatory viewing

If you’re an office worker

You have 45 regular hours

For last week

Should 5 of those be OVT?

There he is!

Good morning mister

Oh fucking Christ

I don’t want to be here

I don’t want to be here

I don’t want to be here

I don’t want to be here

But i am

Here

In the office

Chatting idly

Counting every second

Until i can leave

And breathe again

Mondays huh

Got a case of the Mondays

Uh oh

Looks like we’ve

Got a case of the Mondays

Over here

Am i right

Live and die

And live again

All people come back

You just keep coming back

Until you’ve learned the lesson

Then once you’ve learnt it

You learn it again

A hundred times

Until you know by heart

What it is to be human

Then you die again

When you come back

This time

You’re some animal now

You could be a fly

And fly around

You could be a bird

And fly around

You could be a fish

And swim around

You could be a mole

Dig underground

You could be a bear

Eat berries

You could be a dog

Or a frog

Or a worm

Or snake

Or a turtle

Or a ferret

Or a fox

Or a lobster

There are many animals

But one of them

Will be you

Then you live this life

A thousand times

Some lives are painful

Some are short and sweet

Some are long and fulfilling

You repeat until you’re ready

Again again over over

Then you come back

As a mushroom

Every soul

Gets a turn as a mushroom

That’s just how it goes

What happens next

Is mushroom

Mushroom is cool

You will like it

Then you live a thousand years

Of being a plant

Blade of grass

Tall tree

Flowers

You know

Plants

They grow all over

Once that’s done

You become a germ

For a long time

Until something changes

Then what you are

Is just a drop of water

For a billion years

Or more

You fall

Pool

Evaporate

Fall pool

And they drink you

Sweat and piss you out

Into roots

Into clouds

Into oceans

Into rivers

You go all over

Until the sun swallows the earth

And then

You’re just energy

Burning

Expanding

Dissipating

And then you

Finally

Get to rest

Forever

Back on my bike

New me new bike

Same feeling

I can go fast enough

That it feels good

Just moving

It’s hot

When i sweat

And she thinks so too

The sun grins at me

Obliged i return

The biggest grin

I can manage

Without looking false

I can get anywhere i need

I don’t even have to drive

There’s a place for me

A lane here

Where I’m expected

No one runs me over

Which is great

I hate being run over

The earth has blood

I drink it

Stained deep red black

Around my hands and mouth

It changes me

Makes me feral

Makes me stand and declare

I own this place

It belongs to me

The original sin

Invention of property

Build a wall around

Where I’ve tapped the vein

Where the earth bleeds out

This is my blood

You cannot have it

Not for free

Not like me

I drink deep

Gorge myself turbid gluttonous

Sloshing back and forth

Atop my very tall wall

Lined with razor barbed wire

Which slices any thirsty fool

Who dares try to climb

Their blood runs down the wall

Soaking into the earth

Diluting the pure bloodwell

I drink it all

Tap it dry

Suck from the dry soil

Nothing remains

No blood no water

My stomach bulges hurting

I trip and fall

Far down from the wall

I accelerate

Hit the ground hard and pop

Shedding blood all over

Everything bright red

The last sight i see

Red everywhere

And it all belongs to me